Excellent post which almost can't be followed!!!
However, from a UK charter airline pilot point of view:-
Typical week. 2 days off (probably Wed and Thurs)
Fri 3.45am alarm goes off. At work 5.30am for 6am report. Need to catch up on company e-mails and system takes about 10 minutes to get into (and about 10 passwords!). Check file for any company mail and good stuff like return of leave bids for sometime next year. Chat to cabin crew, chat to Captain, have cups of coffee. Start lengthy discussion into the latest plan for the company to degrade our conditions. Look at flight paperwork for flight information. Hassle ground staff to provide it. Wait 15 minutes whilst they go and get it. Check NOTAMs, weather, more company messages, which aircraft, weather, de-icing, check PLOG, call Ops to get PLOG with correct alternates on, check if tanking fuel. Call fueller, ground handling, etc. Put hats, coats, scarfs, gloves and company trenchcoat on to brave the freezing walk to the aircraft. Get to aircraft to find no-one is there. Ask our ground person why no steps. Lots of shrugging. Call ground handlers ourselves to chivy them along. Wait 10 minutes in the cold whilst steps and airbridge put on. Get on aircraft, run through full checks. Check Tech Log. Start APU. Turn central heating to full hot whilst engineer stands by frowning and drawing breath. Ask engineer why x isn't working. Engineer says "the crew didn't report a malfunction when it came in last night!". More drawing of breath and lots of circuit breaker pulling. Captain goes to do walk round, and en route hassles ground staff to get the cleaners/ caterers/ fuellers to turn up. Now 6.40am and passengers should be boarding but catering not arrived and fuel still going on.
FO enters data into flight computers - route, weights, winds, speeds, etc.
Engineer and Captain back from hassling cabin crew for cup of tea. Ask Engineer if he knows any gossip. Says no, but spends next 10 minutes telling us about new aircraft, new staff, staff who've been sacked, the general poor time engineers have, and then another 10 minutes recalling his experiences in a previous job.
Passengers start boarding. FO gets clearance (instrument clearance) from tower. Pilot flying briefs pilot not flying. This includes all the usual stuff - aircraft, speeds, flap reduction height, emergencies during taxi and on the runway. This might include things like going to full power (from reduced power take off), getting the gear up, height to start the emergency drills, whether we will continue on heading or if we need to turn straight away (for example to avoid a hill straight ahead). We then state if we will hold, if we are going to return or if we were to divert where we might go. Discussion of which pub we'd go to once we'd got the broken aircraft back on the ground.
Cabin crew comes to tell us everyone on board. Now ETD - 30 seconds and load sheet or load figures arrive along with the dispatcher to tell us everyone is on board. Check load sheet and correct errors. Get head count from cabin crew. Doesn't match load sheet. Discover 3 LMCs were accepted and we weren't told.
Tell cabin crew to shut up. Wait 5 minutes whilst ground handler ambles round removing steps, etc. Call tower to ask for push and start. Do pre-start checks. On pushback start each engine in turn. Ask ground crew why we are at a funny angle. Told tug has broken. Think we can taxi from this angle. Do post-start checks. Call tower for clearance to taxi from this angle. Get tug removed from aircraft. Tower call marshaller to check. 5 minutes later marshaller arrives to tell us, yes, we can taxi from here. Call tower for clearance to taxi. Taxi to holding point whilst doing flight control checks, and rest of pre-take-off checks. Sit in queue at holding point whilst 5 low cost carriers turn up and go. Eventually get clearance. Cabin crew tell us cabin is secure for take-off. Final check of wind and line-up. Cleared for take-off, engines up to 50% then full. Off we go. Lots of talk on the radio as we get vectored about and step climbs whilst retracting flaps and accelerating and doing more checks.
Note time of take-off. Moan about time of getting back home tonight. Wind speed up to make us feel better.
Half an hour later talking to the French probably and in the cruise. Tell jokes. Put the company to rights. Put the world to rights. Have discussion about something/ someone. Have tea. Have snacks. Ask how long until lunch. 10am. Have lunch. Horrible sarnie and crisps. Get lots of weather in case of diversion. Play joke on cabin crew. Brief approach. Land. Taxi in, hoping for a stand near to the shops in the terminal. Have same hassles as earlier on ground. Lose 2 passengers, probably still shopping in duty free. Open holds to search for bags. Passengers wander on 10 minutes after scheduled departure time claiming there were no calls for this flight. Funny, cos the other 200 passengers made it. Reload bags. Close up. Proceed as before. 3pm have dinner. More jokes. Play another joke on cabin crew as they have got us back for the earlier one. Call ground handling to tell them precise arrival time and number of wheelchairs required. Try and talk to London who are very busy. Told high speed approved so we fly at 340 knots. Eventually they take a breath and we get a call in. Next frequency are very quiet. Admire fabulous view of city. Get handed to approach. Get told to fly 180 knots. Get vectored round a sightseeing tour of local counties on route to the runway. Do more checks. Have bets on how much longer we are going to be vectored. Take bets on which aircraft we are following. Take bets on how few miles ATC will want us to lose 5000 feet in. Cabin is secure. Disconnect automatics cos it makes it slightly more interesting. Fly ILS approach, land, taxi in, shut down. Fill in reams of boxes on our flight form. Wait 5 minutes for steps to arrive. Ground handler arrives and tells us he didn’t know we wanted wheelchairs. Waste a minute telling him we called his office 30 mins ago. Waste a minute whilst he tells us his office never told him and it’ll be another 30 minutes before the wheelchair company arrive at aircraft. Throw rubbish into overfilled toilet and slam door quick. Find gap in exiting passengers and make a run for it. Hand aircraft to engineer and walk back to crew room. File paperwork, try and remember where car is parked. Drive home.
Sat, Sun – repeat.
Mon – drive through rush hour to report at 5pm for night flight.
Tues – drive home in the morning, have a couple of hours kip. Get up have some food. Try to force body into thinking its night time and need to sleep. Doesn’t work. Get up and drive through rush hour to work.
Do another night flight.
Wed – drive home through rush hour, fall asleep at least twice, honking of horns in traffic jam wakes you up.
Wed/Thurs/ Fri – attempt to recover lost sleep, recover normal eating times (no curry at 3am), remind spouse who you are and explain again why you can’t go out for a drink tonight. Try to trick your body into getting ready for a 4am alarm call on Saturday.