In my 30 odd years of flying around various airports of the world I have seen vast differences in security standards and their application. Obviously the tragic events past have caused a major rethink of the subject, nevertheless we all seem to forget that the common element here is the human being. It matters not a toss what profession you are in - you will always find the arrogant, egotistical, inconsiderate, rude inflexible characters - in this case both sides of the barrier(both gender & security)! You have to remember that more often than not the security staff are only implementing the policy decided upon from up above(ie aiport management) and invariably it is those people who interpret the DofE rules differently which is why there are discrepancies from airport to airport.
It is true there are some who are perhaps overly enthusiastic with their authority but in my experience they are the minority. As has already been said, tolerance and politeness go 99% of the way to ensuring a less stressful path to the a/c. Besides, without all the anecdotes what else would we find to discuss! One of my favourites occurred on deployment to the Gulf from Brize Norton where we were made to put our weapons through the XRay - sorry what do you expect to find hidden in a gun; another gun? Personally I always travel with a leatherman(as crew) and it has never caused a problem and my best weapon against jobsworths is calmness & composure.
Fly Safe