By the year 2010 -
(or earlier if the bearded cave dweller and his camel molesting mouse brained devotees continue to elude their pursuers )
- I can forsee all aircrew having to provide not just a breath and saliva sample for drug/alcohol testing , but also having to bend over for a @nal probe/rectal survey to check for concealed weapons .
(so forget about keeping your nail clippers or leatherman in that cavern)
security imbeciles beware , i await that day with schemeing wicked glee for i intend to return "with compound interest" all your unnessarily bad mannered demeaning acts perpetrated on aircrew and the travelling public.
you see not 500m away from here sits a north indian curry shop that makes a tasty vindaloo , thats so damn ring-burning hot its guaranteed to tarnish shiny metal surfaces , or alternatively , strip and flush all intestinal contents by 7am the next morning .
I can just see the headlines now : security employee asphixiated and his scannertron probe X500 damaged by explosive shower of Vindaloo Surprise , however , crew member feeling fine and aircraft departed 2kg lighter.....