Well, sorry Drauk, but if it was Calais then your mate was totally correct. (And it bears no relation to Teesside - the Cranfield alternate procedure would have been a nearer approximation).
From the north - overhead the beacon, then outbound 063 with a left turn back to the beacon for a parallel entry
then
Right turn outbound, maintaining 2000ft (this is what you seem to think was the hold, but is in fact part of the procedure), for the time stipulated on the plate according to speed. Right turn inbound and established on the localiser. When established (and between 9.5 and 6.1 DME) descend to 1310ft and maintain that until intercepting the glideslope at the NDB.
You can follow it through at
Calais IAP's