3 classics, which are way more than 3rd hand:
My favourite:
Centre: American XXX, descend flight level 150, reduce speed 250 knots and be level in 20 miles.
American XXX: Descend flight level 150 and speed 250. I reckon we're not going to be able to make it in 20 miles.
Centre: You got speedbrakes on that thing, right?
American: We sure do, but they're for my mistakes, not yours. <img src="smile.gif" border="0">
--------------------------------------------------
LATCC: USAir XXX descend to altitude 4000', QNH 1017 millibars.
USAir: Roger descend to altitude 4000' and do you have that in inches.
LATCC: Affirm, USAir, decend to altitude 48000 inches.
--------------------------------------------------
And good ol' Berlin days:
BeaLine XXX: I say Berlin, do you have any turbulence reports lower down? It's so bumpy here that I've just stabbed myself in the nose with my dinner fork.
Berlin: Certainly. Clipper XXX, are you haffing any turbulence at flight level 80?
Clipper XXX: Well Berlin, I don't know. We haven't started eating yet.
.......Damn, why can't I come up with them that quickly?
And.......
Recover