Thompsonfly,
I'm just guessing but I would say you flew a 757 the other day and that you were going for a flap30 landing.
Being an ex- controller HD, you of all people would know that aircraft are very hard to slow down, the pilots should stabilise the aircraft in the landing config by 1000' agl and that flaps have limit speeds which activate a flap load relief system if exceeded.
You make it sound like the end of the world if the flap load relief system activates but it's there for that exact purpose.
I've always found it very useful to do flap25 landings in conditions such as the one you describe. The Vref is normally only about 2 knots higher but the limitspeed on flap25 is 190KIAS rather then 162KIAS for flap30. That way you could easily fly in landing configuration from way out if you find the workload too high to change the config at four miles. On top of that the 757 handles alot better in windy/gusty conditions in flap25 config.
Regs