'Tex old son,
Just a little too much, I'm afraid. You see, truly great wind up merchants know when to pull back from the brink of the absurd, to leave the faithful reader with at least a little seed of doubt as to the legitimacy of the ranter, even when face value says he/she is most certainly a cretin. Never mind, I'm sure you'll develop nicely over time, although your spelling and grammar both require attention.
Anyway, my butler thinks you're a fake, so you must be ....
FF
