After a paticularly sweaty 6 hours flying rat-packs ashore in Sierra Leone and returning to mother for crew-change I made a particularly hairy-arsed flare to 'the black pig'. Obviously too hairy arsed - as soon as the telebrief was in Little-F piped up, "If you want to make approaches like that my boy, get off my ship and buy a F*$king stetson". Funny and suitably humiliating at the same time.
I think the best banter from the realms of history occured when a female MP harshly rebuked Winston Churchill for addressing the house when under the influence. His response, "Yes madam, I am drunk, very, very drunk. But you are ugly, very,very ugly and in the morning I shall be sober".
Beautiful.