All this reminds me of the guy at the airport the other day, all dressed up with 4 gold bars etc. A young girl asked him "are you a pilot, what do you fly" he replied, "see that big plane with 4 engines, thats called a C130, well i fly a C150"
Actually when asked what I do, I use the line "Im a gynocologist, no experience but ill have a look at it for ya"