Interesting topic, which made me think.
I did multi training on a C310 about three years ago and was taught: gear first then flaps. Gear transits slowly and you want to start reducing drag asap. (As an aside, I did gear first then flaps ALL the way up -- from 30 degrees -- on a single engine go around, to the music of the stall warner, the aircraft still sinking, speed probably less than than blue-line and the ground approaching. Instructor put the nose down, swearing softly, and we recovered at about 50 to 100 feet agl. So I learned that the C310 procedure is gear up, flaps to 15 degrees, achieve climb, retract flaps fully, achieve blue line. This is valid for single engine or two engines, I think)
Then two years later I did a (single engine) IR in a Piper Arrow. Go around training was: power full, pitch already full fine, flaps up one notch on the 'handbrake', positive rate of climb, gear up, flaps up fully. This worked very well for the Arrow. The mnemonic was FGF(F).
I suppose the summary is: Know your aeroplane, its' performance and the FM/POH. Fly the aeroplane. Any go around close to the ground in IMC and especially SE MUST MUST be flown correctly.
Be Safe.... .Regards