I would like the A36 but I have been very spooked about weight and balance stories
Why listen to stories? The A36 (as previously mentioned has very few real mass/balance issues - the wing is 12" further aft for a start)
I have flown just about every aircraft in this 'class' fairly extensively. The 'straight' 210 is not a bad machine at all but the turbo is less nice (fiddly for very little gain) and I thought that the P210 was an utter hound.
Problem with 'em is that they are Cessnas - rather plasticky and naff in many places, particularly in the build quality. I also think that they are somewhat unrewarding to fly. I personally like the 182 MUCH more than the 210. Just from the running cost point of view it is a far more practical proposition. A look at the current Cessnas in production will reveal the 182 going strong but not a 210 in sight.
For my money (particularly if you are moving from a 182) it's the Beech every time. Those last two seats are a bit 'occasional' but at least you have the option of club seating or forward facing (as the day dictates), you have an aircraft that flies really nicely, that lands sweetly, that goes quickly. You have the option to add/modify/primp or jazz up your Bonanza until you run out of money or ideas thanks to the huge following (Beryl D'Shannon Tip Tanks would be my first addition). You also have a really huge door which is genuinely useful - rather than a hatch for bags or lobbing stuff over the back seats.
You're quite simply mad if you fail to properly consider the Beech. I think that this...
Having owned a PA32 (4 years) previously and still owning a BE36 (31 years and 4000 hours)
...says it all.
Go for a post '84 model (post '89 if poss) and set to it with some tasty mods.
As far as mass/balance goes the main issue is that the fuel is all forwards of the CG so as you fly the CG gently migrates aft. Ergo you should at least check the ZFMCG to establish a max CG range for your flight.
Whatever you get - enjoy it.