You are unlikely to get a good understanding of the subject through any kind of quick fix from this forum. Have you discussed this problem with your instructor? It sounds as if you are trying to hide your problems from your instructors instead of asking for their help in overcoming them.
I don't know many of the instructors at OATS, but they will probably be only too happy to do all they can to help, if you make them aware of your concerns. A couple of hours of 1 to 1 extra tuition will probably solve your problem.
Most instructors are not particulary interested in the really clever students. They get far more job satisfaction from the students who have problems but are prepared to work hard to solve them.