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Old 7th Apr 2004, 02:03
  #17 (permalink)  
Blacksheep
Cunning Artificer
 
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: The spiritual home of DeHavilland
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Angel

Wow so much fun for so little effort!!

Does anyone wonder, like me, how the British intelligence services ever thought up that master stroke of monitoring mobile phone traffic? Catching a terrorist cell before they had even selected their target is pretty cool stuff. Maybe they had lessons from Cubby Broccoli?

As a former miltary man, government employee and expatriate engineer the only people who have any of my prints are the Aliens unit ( I put 'Mars' under Place of Birth on the application form) of the local National Registration section of the Interior Ministry (muslims to a man) and they only have my thumb prints. Nowadays I must always remember to put elastoplasts on my thumbs before committing criminal offences, although the sunglasses and beard on my ID Card mugshot provides a certain amount of cover. So much for civil liberties... The British police have lots of footage of my real mug in their video records and I can well imagine the excitement created in New Scotland Yard's gigantic video monitoring centre when I carried that large brown paper parcel down Oxford Street just a couple of weeks ago. Especially after the video monitor in a St. Albans garden centre recorded me buying that large sack of fertilizer only a few days earlier. I wonder if that had anything to do with the strange waiter in Vega putting sellotape on my empty water glass? Lately I've been thinking of beating my wife into wearing a headscarf just to wind them up a bit more. You can have loadsa fun with a mobile phone too - just dial anyone at random and say a few selected words like 'Osama' 'Mladic' 'Radovan' 'centrifuge' or 'James Hewitt' for example... Since it's just down the road from St Albans I popped into the masjid in Finsbury Park to pick up a copy of one of their popular publications on the benefits of martyrdom. That should be good for fixing up a couple of Special Branch coppers with a few nights in the freezing rain, hiding behing the bushes over the road, eh?

BTW, is irony completely dead west of Rockall?

Last edited by Blacksheep; 7th Apr 2004 at 02:21.
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