My name is Chuks but you can call me 'sir'.
Gee, and I thought I was the only one sometimes having trouble with stroppy F/Os!
Of course the first thing to bear in mind, at least in my case, is that you get back what you hand out. 'What goes around, comes around.'
'Young people' today are not prepared to take a back seat and be talked down to the way our generation was. They tend to fire back with company procedures meant to protect their rights and feelings. I have to accept that the world has changed and deal with that.
We sometimes get a flight that develops into a table-tennis match, when the F/O cites page 112 of the SOPs and I cite an over-riding clause on page 221 or claim 'pilot's discretion' or whatever.
What I cannot do, what had been done to me, is to suggest he just sit there and look out the window. Those days are long gone, and it may be just as well. I used to fly with a 'Great Stone God' in a DC-3 who thought I was a wimp for even wanting to wear a headset. I should just sit there and work the gear and flaps to hand signals, was his take on reality. We each thought the other was mad!
I have tried to just back as far off as I can, while still maintaining standards, and let the F/O have as much responsibility as he can handle. That seems to work. And for the ones who want to make trouble, I make sure that I know the back of the book as well as they do, so that I am not left baffled by b*ll****.
As to the rest of it, people I get along with call me by my first name. Anyone who wants to give me any sh*t, they can call me 'sir' or else come along and talk to management about whatever problem we are having. That seems to work, so long as I am careful to check what message I am sending in the first place.