True story.
Rather dotty student lost on dual navigation exercise with instructor. Instructor knew position but was waiting to see how said student dealt with the problem. They were north of Cranfield in the UK. They were ex Luton which is well south of Cranfield. Student called Luton Approach, they quickly identified her position and suggested she call Cranfield on xxx.xx. Conversation that followed:
Student: Hello Cranfield.
ATC: Hello
Long pause
ATC: Go on give us a clue.
Another that springs to mind was a PPL at Luton in the circuit having forgotten to call 'downwind'. He remembered when late downwind and said to the tower:
PPL: 'G-xxx was downwind L/H 26, please note the use of the past tense.
And finally overheard in the south of England some years ago a student on a solo navigation exercise and lost. Quite correctly called for assistance:
ATC: Are you India Mike or Victor Mike?
Long pause.
Student: Negative, I am a student pilot.
[ 07 October 2001: Message edited by: M.Mouse ]