A moving story and a courageous post, thank you for sharing this with us. You have been given notice of an impending event that we all have a date with. Whether that knowledge is useful, disturbing or anything else is up to you and how you manage to deal with it. I hope that you will be able to find enjoyment and peace throughout every single day of the life ahead of you. I'm sure that there will be lots of opportunities to get air under the tyres, even if you will not be able to log them as PIC. Stick around and share your challenges and worries, we can deal with that as well as happy aeroplane stories.