My nurse daughter advises: at the first sign of trouble, take 2 paracetamol and one ibuprofen every 4 hours (max 8 and 4 respectively per 24 hours). Paracetamol brings down the fever and ibuprofen kills the aches - or maybe it's the other way round.
A good hot toddy is whisky (or whiskey) mixed equally with undiluted lemon squash, heated in the microwave. Seems to work well when taken with above (not necessarily sound medical advice).
My mum used to make a linctus for my dad by sprinkling sugar over sliced onions and leaving in the fridge for a couple of days to go syrupy. My dad used to prefer Liqufruita (sp?), the one made with garlic, more garlic and most garlic. He would sniffle and stink for days.
BTW Muppet, the title of this thread doesn't make any sense, so you're potentially losing much valuable advice.