I think the problem is with the student! The length of your post says it all, you are obsessed with all the wrong things. If you want to learn to fly an aeroplane just do what the instructor shows you. Now there lies a possible problem, you are in the USA and the method of teaching is totally different to the method we use in the UK and Europe. We teach by building blocks where one exercise leads to the next and progress can be easily seen. The FAA method of teaching is more akin to a combination of coaching and osmosis, if you do something enough times somerthing should sink in. You are being introduced to things that are too advanced for the level you are at. Not everyone can fly an aircraft and it has nothing to do with intelligence. You have reached 59 hours; somebody should have told you something by now. If you keep plodding away you may crack it but will you be a safe pilot.
Get an instructor who you don't know to do an honest assessment, don't bother with his life story or yours, just tell him you have done x-hours, are you wasting your time.