Here's an idea: Mayday (and Pan) calls should initially go to an automated call centre.
Pleasant female voice recording:
Please listen to all the following options, because they may have changed since you last contacted us with a problem.
If your Mayday / Pan call is about your aircraft or someone in it, press your transmit key once.
If your Mayday / Pan call is about some other aircraft or person, press your transmit key twice.
If you're busy managing some problem, please monitor this frequency until the next available controller can respond to your call.
I've read lots of bull**** on lots of PPRuNe threads over a couple of decades. The accumulation of some of the bull**** on this thread means it may achieve G(BT)OAT.