We’re slowly turning her back into a positive view, but as lots have said, it only takes one in uniform that’s the voice of the service to put a doubt in someone’s mind. At least she’s still doing her gliding and a bit of rotary to keep her busy.
I understand, all I ever wanted to do was fly with the RAF. On my 13th birthday I range the local ATC and left a message asking how to join and leaving my phone number. I did that three more times and never received a reply. When I was 15 and the services came to my school for career days I went to the RAF desk and arranged for an interview and I heard nothing back (years later my parents told me that the school had forgotten to tell me the time the interview had been arranged for).
Anyway, my response to all of that was to pretend that I was no longer interested in aircraft or flying, and definitely not in the RAF. None of that was true, it was just a way to escape from the disappointment. Flying in the RAF is still the only thing I ever
wanted to do, everything else has just been something I can do. If your daughter says she doesn't want to become a pilot in the RAF it could just be a way of dealing with the disappointment rather than what she really wants.