So there’s a few things going on here.
Regarding the issue of “should have paid to sit together”. Fine as a general statement but in reality no one on here knows when the ticket was booked, what was available at the time, etc. I also know from personal experience that I sometimes get stuck in a “loop” on the JQ website when trying to pay for seats, where the payment page sends me back to the seat selections page, then that sends me to the payment page, which sends me back to the seat selection page. I have reported it when I’ve had time to phone up to resolve (I think 3 times) and each time the call centre are “very sorry” and will “pass it on”.
So it’s not necessarily as simple as “should have paid to sit together”.
Now of course as widely known by those in the industry, crew directions are to be followed. However, when two pax both wish to swap (one to sit next to family, one being nice and permitting the person to sit next to their family) it is not as complicated as they are making it seem. I don’t work for JQ and never have. I use Sabre and swapping pax like this can be done in about 20 seconds, even if it involved re opening the flight. Maybe 60 seconds maximum for a new user. So, if two pax have swapped like this there are ways to resolve it that don’t need to involve the “I AM THE BOSS DO AS I SAY” attitude from the staff. Compassionate grounds to exist.
PR, Passenger Comfort, and OTP would have all been better by resolving this in a common sense (non red tape) way.
There is no doubt that the instructions from the crew SHOULD have been followed, but also no doubt that it WOULD have been quicker and easier to resolve by permitting and facilitating the swap. His actions were manifestly different to, let’s say, refusing to put out a cigarette.
As stated above - No one wins here unfortunately.