i really find this whole deal more depressing than the situation that caused me to seek help, but i suppose that i should respond to the replies so far:
aztruck: you seem very emphatic and admittedly, within an industry such as this, your comments may be held true. however, the individual points could be read in two ways.
i) you never met anybody that has ADMITTED that they smoke pot, but do you really think that, if they did, they'd broadcast the fact? Is it not possible that you HAVE in fact met, and potentially FLOWN with somebody who, within the last 30 days, had done as little as a puff on a joint?
ii) you imply (and i am more than happy to be corrected on this, as it is an interpretation issue) that i am talking about people taking pot, or indeed any drugs whatsoever, on a regular basis. As far as I interpret (and again, i could be misinterpreting) you are not actually offering a reply relevant to the post, within which i am referring to the one-off "indulgence" that is regretted in retrospect.
griffinblack: I agree that i probably did not help my case by not posting details on my profile, but believe me i have reason. Surely it must cross your - and indeed everybody's - mind that there may be certain posts that, perhaps, people create in a sense "anonymously" while still having the luxury of things such as (and as unimportant as it seems to some, it is equally as IMPORTANT to others) email notification of replies?
Yes, I admit it, I dared to create....a second account! Do you really think that I wish to make it publicly known that I am enquiring after such things - which may personally effect me? Even if my other username is not even well known, should I risk everything on my post?
Now, I can see myself being branded a hypocrite. "If he doesn't think it's OK to ask under his normal nick, why should it be OK for people to reply to said post?!" And as far as I'm concerned, people NEED not reply. Any replies posted are done so by individuals who I believe, considering a significant number of them are regularly in charge of 200+ pax, are capable of making that judgement themselves.
However, I believe that it was clearly in my previous reply (and, as I thought at the time, also made clear in the original post) that the situation should realistically be clear enough that, should anybody wish to reply, yet have nothing relevant to add - or to join the seemingly widespread pastime around here of denouncing me as a "troll" (a common accusation by all accounts) - they really should save their time + breath. This is not a question looking for answers in the form of "yeah, fsck off, you're trying to get us in trouble".
K Soze: yes, unfortunately for me I also noticed these other posts (as dumb as I might look i do have a couple of braincells to rub together, especially when it comes to something in which i have a vested personal interest in) - which in fact rise well above my own in terms of viewings and especially contributions (maybe i upset too many people :
). Like I said, this is very unfortunate for me. Yet I cannot see what exactly I can do to CHANGE this. Again, as pointed out above, if people wish to post it's their choice. I have publically announced that I have no interest in screwing anybody else over, simply in something that is, right now, HIGHLY relevant to myself. If people wish to reply, yet are afraid about the publicitiy, please feel free to PM me. If you do not wish to risk even doing that then -more unfortunately for me than for you! - I have no other suggestions on how to relay your advice.
To summarize: as I stated in my earlier (admittedly rather heated) reply, I'm asking for advice here. Advice that could affect the rest of my life. If you have such advice, great. If you have yourself been in such a situation, or indeed know of others who have (and look people, I'm not asking for NAMES, i'm asking for ADVICE) then I appreciate your replies.
I see how my own reply may be viewed as a flame, but please understand that not only am I personally under considerable stress, I also feel that in principle I was justified, and that something had to be said.
As far as I'm concerned, PPRUNE is - and should remain - a place that others and I can come to requesting advice. I don't think that I should be scared (as I have been for many months) of posting such a question. Unless, of course, somebody can recommend a different site
So, if you have advice I welcome it with open arms (and trust me, they're REALLY open. In fact, my shoulders've started hurting
). But if all you can bring is scepticism at the sincerity of my request then feel free to ignore - i'd rather you did that than push me into a pointless rebuttal.
magick-