Ah, like the old story…
747 at night going across the pond. A couple hours out of JFK, the Captain makes an announcement to the pax:
“Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain speaking. We’ve had a little mechanical trouble with one of our engines and we’ve gone ahead and shut it down just as a precaution. We’ve still got three good engines and that’s more than enough to safely get us to our destination, so there’ s nothing to worry about. However, not having that engine means that we won’t make the same kind of time we’d have made with all four, so our arrival is going to be a little later than planned. It’s looking like we’ll be about an hour behind schedule when we land. Hope this doesn’t cause too much trouble for you. Thanks.“
An hour later, the Captain makes another announcement:
“Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain speaking. We’ve had some trouble with another engine and had to shut it down as well. Again, nothing to worry about. On this aircraft, two engines provide more than enough power to safely get us where we’re going. The bad news is that this is going to slow us down even more, and we’re going to be almost three hours late on our arrival. We’re really sorry if this has an impact on your plans. Thank you.”
An hour later, the Captain makes still another announcement:
“Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain again. Well, we’ve had a little difficulty with a third engine and had to shut it down as well. Rest assured that this aircraft can safely fly anywhere in the world on a single engine, so there is absolutely no danger. However, it now looks as though we’re going to be right around six hours late on arrival. We’re terribly sorry about this. If there’s anything we can do to make your flight more pleasant, don’t hesitate to let one of the flight attendants know.”
Upon which one passenger turns to another and says, “Good Lord!. If we loose one more engine we’ll be up here all night!”
Dave
PS Lots of flexibility on the punch line. Like, “Upon which your mother turns to me and says…”