I can probably add some useful advice here;
1. Marrying an EU wife will generally give you 'restricted rights' to live and work in that particular country. It should not, subject to the laws in that country, stop you from living and working in that country. It would not generally however give you the right to go and live and work elsewhere in the EU.
2. Most probably, EU wife has the right to go and live anywhere else in EU and probably take you as 'hubby' with her. The procedure and time taken to grant 'hubby' rights to work in that other country however, I believe, is up to the rules and restrictions imposed by that other EU country. I do not know what the rules r the time frame involved is. That you need to investigate specificaly.
3. Also beware of the problem in 'exchanging' a non JAR licence for a JAR one. That will probably give you restricted rights. E.G. You meet the criteria of 'obtaining' a UK JAR licence based on your experience level etc, and the UK issue you with a UK issued licence, issued in accordance with JAR FCL 1. The big advisory is that this entitles you to fly UK registered aircraft alone. The UK cannot give you the rights to fly other JAR member registered aircraft and that is dependant on the other EU (JAR compliant) state granting approval; Not Guaranteed.
It is a minefield out there and you need to do your research carefully!
As to the rights and wrongs, who cares. Rules are rules and you have to meet them. If it's an 'unbalanced playing field' out there, so be it. You cannot realistically expect to change the rules. You will reach retirement age before you succeed. A good example of this is the French attitude to over 60's flying in their airspace. Outrageous maybe, but they are achieving their aim. So, are the English that arrogant? Maybe in Rugby, but not flying! And our beef is very good anyway!
Time for another French Revolution, me thinks! Time to lop off a few heads, especially in the French unions and DGCA!
P.S. Marrying an EU wife should also come with an ECAM Advisory! Joking, of course!