This has nothing to do with 'My airport has more movements than yours'. Most pilots only get to operate within their own continent but as a long-hauler I hear controllers communicating professionally all over the world - with the notable exception of JFK and a couple of other eastern seaboard cities.
There is no excuse for rudeness, impatience or aggression on the radio. Likewise sending a heavy aircraft on final to the back of the queue because he is unable to adhere to speed control designed for little aeroplanes is the same arrogant mindset the CBP officer shows when he sends someone away who simply does not understand him. I have sipped a beverage (or two) down-route with some really nice US pilots who are a credit to our profession. Sadly every village has an idiot who does the rest of you no favours.
BTW.... in my experience... the nicest controllers are in Texas. I don't know why,... they always sound calm, hospitable and without stress. Maybe that's a Texan thing?