Well hi! It's great you're doing this, it's a huge step and probably the hardest one from what everyone tells me! I'm about 2 months away from my instrument written and checkride.
I'll tell you the best tool I had after I understood the basics and regulations... Microsoft Flight Simulator. I know the tactile feel isn't there, but the approaches are exact, the instrumentation is there and so is a crappy version of ATC. Get plates and enroute charts and use those with the game. Best of all, the hours you spend on it are free
not like a flight training device with instructor. DON'T use it as a primary tool, just use it for practice, put in real winds, try different things with the approaches and holds. goto odd places around the world and do approaches and holds there.
most of all, GET TO KNOW WEATHER! and weather products. NOAA has great books, as does the FAA. Jepesson has some, but I don't like them as much, they don't get specific enough. Any of these books can be found on sportys website (sportys.com)
just be ready for a lot of hard work and studying.
ASK QUESTIONS!!! don't let ANYTHING go or put anything off, if you don't understand something or sort-of understand something, ask and make sure you understand it!!! I'm going through the training right now...
MAKE SURE your instructor isn't just making you recite back regulations and operations on how to do things... make sure he's giving you complex situations to think about...
for instance, you've just taken off from your home airport bound for one 100 miles away, you've been cleared to a fix just outside the destination for holding and you lose your radios, what do you do and with the given weather did you have to file an alternate, etc...
you get the point... make him/her give you situations (verbally) to work with. anyone can site back regulations saying "you need to file an alternate if wx is less than 2000' & 3miles or there is no instrument approach" but it takes someone who understands the material to be able to use it in a real life situation... i.e.
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with the following TAF predictions, do you need an alternate if the intended destination has an instrument approach and you're arriving at 1000z?
(ficticious, do not use)
FM2200 16004KT P6SM VCSH BKN035 OVC060
FM0300 13007KT 5SM -SHRA BKN005 OVC010
FM1000 15010KT P6SM VCSH BKN050