I don't buy the argument that you have to be an @rsehole to be an effective killer and warrior.
That's naively simplistic.
Quite possible to treat your fellows with respect (different to being nice) yet have no compunction about shooting an enemy in the face.
The idea that you simply have to be a
pr!ck to lead from the front, to face danger and win is exactly what's causing so many problems in the world right now.
It's called the big man theory of leadership - if it looks and sounds like an alpha male, then it must be an effective leader.
A former mentor and ex-fast jet pilot put it quite wisely in my view.
If you want people to run at a machine gun, you have to seduce them to do so.