Ifbb relax.
It is the job.
simply has nothing to do with that job having the same name but done 15-20 years ago and earlier.
The solution IS to change job, not to change employer.
I don't have the strength or will to it anymore.
just letting the time pass and eventually I'll be done with it in some more years.
sad? Yes it is.
like it was sad to work in mines a century ago.
This is actually many times better than that
KL