You know you're a pilot when....

[PompeyPaul]

...you read the TAFs to decide if you should hang your washing out or not :ok:

[Gertrude the Wombat]

I'm not sure they're good enough in today's weather!

I've just been out delivering election leaflets and got rained on. Went home, half a mile away, to find dry pavements and sunshine. The airport is a couple of miles further away so its TAF won't give any useful predictions for my garden for the next couple of hours!

[stiknruda]

when....

You give your postcode in phonetics, without even thinking about what you are doing!

[Grob Queen]

...like it Stik! I give postcode, car reg, in fact where letters are concerned, everything in phonetics...was in the florist and gave the recipients postcode in Phonetics and the assistant looked at me as though I was barking...and she should be used to it...this was in Lincoln high street!

Like the idea for using TAFs for washing...

I have found, since I have been training is that I always test the car brakes and do a "check A" when I drive it...sad or what :hmm:

[abgd]

No, not sad. Sensible.

What I've started to notice, is other people who know and use the phonetic alphabet. They can't all be pilots, surely?

[Ultranomad]

...when you catch yourself fumbling for a belt on the office chair or mentally searching for a trim wheel in a car after getting onto a straight motorway.
What I've started to notice, is other people who know and use the phonetic alphabet. They can't all be pilots, surely?
It's also used by sailors, police, and armed forces. Airline reservation agents understand it, too.

[distaff_beancounter]

Entered solid cloud and instantly went onto instruments like a well trained IMCr pilot .....
...... then realised that I had just driven my CAR into a bank of thick fog :ugh:

[Pilot.Lyons]

When i drive i actually find myself looking more at the sky!

Hehe only a matter of time! :rolleyes:

[CharlieDeltaUK]

....when you fill your car with fuel and don't wince when you insert your credit card at the kiosk.

...when you still get annoyed that the TV weather forecast no longer includes synoptic charts

...when you drive an old car because you know that buying a new car and flying will defitnitely end in divorce

...when you can help your kids understand vectors when they do maths homework

[AndoniP]

You say words like roger, affirm and wilco in the office :(

[The500man]

...you pay three times the normal price for a ruler because it's marked in NMs!

...you use the AeroWeather App to see if you need to wear a coat or not.


What I've started to notice, is other people who know and use the phonetic alphabet. They can't all be pilots, surely?


Phonestics are used on train radio as well but there is no test of any sort before you can use it.

[J.A.F.O.]

...everybody else does. :}

[Genghis the Engineer]

You reply to emails from your boss with 'Wilco G-E'

G

[taybird]

Your home pages are the Metoffice TAFS page and SkyDemonLight

You realise you spend more time with aeroplanes than you do at home

You have bits of aeroplane in your car / pocket / house / (handbag)

You forget that a car has a chassis, not a fuselage

You're glad you're not married, because if you were then you'd most likely be divorced (and that costs money that would better be spent flying)

[pasir]

... get up late on a sunny Sunday morning - go to the airfield - into your own plane for lunch at Le Touquet ...

...

[PompeyPaul]

It grates when you hear someone say "over and out" and it takes every ounce of self control to not correct them.

You hear somebody speak in phonetics who then says "nine" instead of "niner" and it irritates you.

You wish everyone would read back important instructions. "Let's meet up at the pub tonight @ 20:00" - "Ok, meet at the pub at 20:00 tonight" - "read back correct"

You wince at the price of the MOT & Service on your car as you realise you actually spend more time flying than driving your car about the place.

When installing a cat flap you find yourself measuring the height of your cat in nautical miles and then drilling everything, sawing everything, based on nautical miles.

You see co-ordinates written down and have a clue as to where that may actually be!

[fireflybob]

You turn off all the electrics on your car before switching off the ignition and are offended when others don't do the same.

[abgd]

Nonsense, you measure the height of the cat in feet, the width in km and the length in nautical miles. As for mouse consumption... It depends whether it's an American, British or European cat.

[jollyrog]

... you hear your family asking each other to "Say again".

[Grob Queen]

Nonsense, you measure the height of the cat in feet, the width in km and the length in nautical miles. As for mouse consumption... It depends whether it's an American, British or European cat.

...and when finished measuring your cat(s) in various units..you discuss with them the merits of the navex which you are planning...the chart for which, incidentally, they are sitting on... :)

[B Fraser]

You mend a classic car using lockwire to secure the nuts, it passes an MOT but you can't fix an aircraft that is more straightforward as you don't have the right licence.

[Jan Olieslagers]

other people who know and use the phonetic alphabet. They can't all be pilots, surely? Friend of mine knows them from her police job. We once used them at an informal meeting and one person was highly offended, thinking we were mocking him in our secret code language.

[Pilot.Lyons]

Haha jollyrog

[VP-F__]

you get into the car on the left side and wonder why the wheel is not in front of you :O

[Jan Olieslagers]

Easy solution is to come and live on the Continent.

[Barcli]

"When installing a cat flap you find yourself measuring the height of your cat in nautical miles and then drilling everything, sawing everything, based on nautical miles."

Love this - been `DIY,ing in the house for about 15 yrs with the same nm ruler - why does it not lose itself after a week like any normal ruler ?

[mikehallam]

BTW. Whilst the Final(s) discussion continues - surely proof the wx in Albion is poor this week. And thus on a similar pedantic vein............

'A rule is a measuring device, a ruler is a thing for drawing straight lines', is what my maths master used to drill into us.

mike hallam.

[piperboy84]

While out for the Sunday drive with the wife your attention is constantly drawn to the PCAS unit you have stuck up on the dash for the afternoon

[Doodlebug]

Yes, yes, yes Jollyrog! :}

[BroomstickPilot]

The following question evinces the following reply: -

"How fast do you usually drive on the motorway"?

"77 mph indicated; 70 true".

Regards,

BP.

[DavidWoodward]

You turn off all the electrics on your car before switching off the ignition and are offended when others don't do the same.

Haha! I do this all the time!

[Gertrude the Wombat]

... you hear your family asking each other to "Say again"
Yup, that happens in my family :):):)

[Ultranomad]

Love this - been `DIY,ing in the house for about 15 yrs with the same nm ruler - why does it not lose itself after a week like any normal ruler ?

Because it has an anti-loss device built in - why else would it cost ten times the normal ruler?

[Pitts2112]

...you absent-mindedly increase the pressure on the gas pedal when the nose of the car drifts to the left.

...an hour of flight time becomes your basic economic unit..."Lessee this dinner is costing me...ummmm...an hour and a half of flying! Sod that. We're eating at home!"

[NightWolf]

You hear an electric bell and automatically think fire drill and look to press the red engine fire switchlight in front of you.

[BackPacker]

...you come upon an inconvenient detour in your car, and think "I have not seen a NOTAM about this."

[jez d]

... the word 'flaps' no longer elicits a school boy chuckle

[AfricanEagle]

...an hour of flight time becomes your basic economic unit...

:ok: Very true :)

[transmitforDF]

told a customer on the phone the other day "read you fives" when they were concerned about their line not working, you can imagine the confused reaction....

[funfly]

When you never ever tell anyone about that moment when you were flying when you thought "Oh ****".

[pudoc]

You know you're a C152 pilot when you shoulder barge your car door to open it.

I've actually done this more than once and when the door didn't open I had a rather confused feeling for a few seconds.

[Vino Collapso]

When you consider that paying over £100 for a beefburger is a good deal.

[fireflybob]

When you drive on the motorway and pretend to be flying under all the bridges!

[Miken100]

.... on a bright summers day when the air is full of haze and poor viz and people say "What a lovely day" and you say "No it isn't!"

[BackPacker]

...you're driving in your car, need to concentrate on a difficult traffic situation but can't find the "pilot isolation" button to mute out the chitchat of your passengers.

...you back up your TomTom with an actual road atlas.

[mary meagher]

Dulles Airport, Washington DC. Couple of hours to kill, ate a meal, then decided to do the walk from one end of the concourse to the other....I calculate the concourse is at least a mile and a half, so that would be 3 miles, should take another hour.....

Stopped at the farthest end from my London gate....to catch my breath, leaned against the barrier of a flight to Texas, where the pilot, hoping NOT to have to offload the bags of a missing passenger, asked me "Are you for Houston?"

Without any thought, I firmly replied "Negative!"

His look of surprised recognition and brotherhood kept me airborne all the way back to the London gate.

PS. I don't look like a pilot, I look like a granny. Heck, I am a granny.

[Pace]

Mary

Youngest Granny in UK is 29!!! not far off you ;)

Pace

[J.A.F.O.]

... the word 'flaps' no longer elicits a school boy chuckle

Seems I'm still not a pilot.

[mattycourt]

When your in the car at a junction;

'Clear left'

[Cricket23]

....when you tell people on the phone to 'Standby'.

[Shiny side down]

When you drive on the motorway and pretend to be flying under all the bridges!


As a kid, I did that. I growed up now. while thinking about it, I'm wondering if a 757 would fit...

[conners88]

...when you locate and turn on the overhead 'courtesy' light in your car as if you are selecting landing lights 'on' in an A320...

[2high2fastagain]

...when you compulsively pull out the choke of your car every ten minutes and count to ten.

[Fly26]

you declare items in your car 'U/S' without thinking to your confused passenger constantly pushing the window switch................

[pudoc]

...when you'd rather fly than have sex.

[Morrisman1]

I had a customer ring me at work, and at the end of the conversation he asked "are you a pilot?" and I was thinking WTF how the hell does he know. He said that I had read out all the letters from a product code using the phonetic alphabet. Didn't realise that I had until he told me!

[FlyingSportsman]

the highlight of your week is spending an hour cramped in an overpriced spam can :E

FS :ok:

[Tupperware Pilot]

The nice women in the garage looks at you strangely when you say the new exhaust you have just had fitter "has just cost me 4 hours flying"!!!!!!!
:ok:

[fireflybob]

When you do FREDA checks whilst driving along the motorway

[Aware]

You have just renewed all your ratings. and medical, and your Wife asks you where is the money for this years holiday !

[Jan Olieslagers]

... you can't write a one-liner without at least three spelling errors in it.

[pudoc]

...when you pull up outside your house and switch into reverse gear whilst travelling at 30mph.

[PilotPieces]

When you get pulled over for driving down the center line of the road.

[Katamarino]

...when you compulsively pull out the choke of your car every ten minutes and count to ten.

When you're still driving a car with a choke in the year 2012 because you spent all your money on flying :E

[stiknruda]

....when people dont understand your stories because of all the acronym'


When you are in a mtg with a new client that descends into techie speak and you wonder why they keep using ICAO/IATA codes:ugh:

then you realise that they are the latest acronyms for new wonder-gadgets!

[bubo]

....when you are lost in a strange city you turn your head to the back row seats, release steering wheel and study the map....

[dont overfil]

When the picture of your aircraft comes out of your wallet more often than the picture of your girl.
D.O.

[TractorBoy]

...when you desperately want to lean the mixture while driving down the motorway

[fwjc]

... when you stay teetotal just because you know you're flying in the morning (and yet you'd happily drive home after a couple!)

[18greens]

..when you go to a party and tell everyone you are a pilot.

[thing]

..when you go to a party and tell everyone you are a pilot.

Is the winner..:)

There used to be an old RAF joke that I can't quite remember now but part of it was 'How do you know if there's a Harrier pilot at a party? His wife will tell you.'

[Nibbler]

when you are unable to stop yourself assessing the world in terms of visibility, cloud base and wind speed

when you notice the sales person on the telephone fails to use the phonetic alphabet correctly

when planning a short break or holiday you start with the self fly option and refuse to accept the £29.99 return flight with NOTSOEASY to a.n.y.w.h.e.r.e. is so much the better deal....

[Grob Queen]

There used to be an old RAF joke that I can't quite remember now but part of it was 'How do you know if there's a Harrier pilot at a party? His wife will tell you.'

Thing,
The slightly different one which I know from my Harrier friend is "how do you know theres a Harrier Pilot in the room?" because he'll tell you! ...Now I believe its Typhoon pilots... ;)

ps..like the driving down the centre line of the road one...I ahve to think twice sometimes, especially after a lesson in the circuit!

[LD1Racing]

Ok, so I'm not quite a pilot yet, but since learning, I have started requesting taxi clearances before reversing off the drive, and carrying out regular FREDA checks while driving.

Incidently, phonetics are widely used by many people, even the OH used them when working in a call centre as a student.

Oh, and I agree with the unit of currency becoming 1 hour's flying.

[fwjc]

... you're posting on pprune at 0026 (UTC, of course)...

[WestWind1950]

.... when you buy anything that has to do about flying or having planes/hot air balloon motives on them like:

- bed sheets
- jewelry
- gift wrapping paper
- posters
- lamps
- toilet seat covers (yes, I have one with balloons on it!)
- blankets
- t-shirts/blouses

and your apartment almost looks like a flying museum!

[Ringway Flyer]

'Yes' to lots of these, especially when driving, the moving brake test and electrics off before closing down the engine being 2nd nature.

And occasionally 'doors to manual' when stopped....

Btw - a tank of Derv is now almost an hour's flying. But it does allow 10 hours driving.

That said, I'd sooner have an hour in the air...:ok:

[Grob Queen]

Thanks M Berger!

...I won't REALLY be that sort of Club Secretary...i'll leave that to the CFI ;)

[ShyTorque]

When your watch is bigger than your d**k.

[ShyTorque]

Better off with a tachy ;)

[riverrock83]

when you spend as much time looking at the sky for other planes around you as you do looking for cars on the road in front of you

[Sorry Pilot.Lyons (http://www.pprune.org/members/372972-pilot-lyons) - now realised thats a dup]

[transmitforDF]

Definitely put my life at risk every time I happen to be on the M25 to the west of Hounslow.

When you p*** everyone in the supermarket car park off as you slowly reverse out of your bay then pause for a while as you await the imaginary tug to drive off. Of course brake testing proceeding this makes you very popular too.

[natops]

.....when you wonder why your wife doesn't come with a checklist...

[Aspiring Pilot Alex]

... when a man can follow instructions (checklist), not deviate and do what he thinks is right.

[Genghis the Engineer]

.....when you use old VNC's for wallpaper....then point out any changes when someone comments on it....

Personally I used them for birthday and christmas wrapping paper.

G

[mary meagher]

When you realise that wearing the pilot suit featuring your wings is naff, and you roll up to fly in a beat up old car looking more like a mechanic.....

[thing]

and you roll up to fly in a beat up old car looking more like a mechanic.....

But I've always done that....:)