As was posted by someone earlier there is some classics from the IFR crew as well if you happen to monitor both frequencies..
"centre abc 2 min TOD xxx"
"abc NO REPORTED IFR TRAFFIC"
"all stations 126.7 xxx CTAF abc an IFR xxx is xx dme inbound on the xxx radial on decent passing FL xxx tracking direct NA for the runway xx rnav aproach estimate NA at time xx"
What the hell is billy bob in the drifter suposed to think !!!
If you have no reported traffic then who the hell are you talking to...???
should he pipe up and say "station inbound I have no idea what you are talking about but I am on a wide left base xx, on the ground in 10"
In reality you have made life so hard for them they will more likely shut up and say nothing...!
YOU are the visitor (most of the time), be friendly, courteous and speak english, you will get much further i reckon !!