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What's New In W. Africa (Nigeria)

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What's New In W. Africa (Nigeria)

Old 26th Sep 2016, 02:12
  #5361 (permalink)  
 
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Come on now NEO....some of us were Bachelors living in a Married Accompanied Operation....and had two locked gates and a Police Check Point to get through from our Digs on the World Renown Idugbo Estate in order to visit our Married friends on the Shell Camp.

Although compared to Colditiz in Port Harcourt....even Igdugbo was sheer luxury!




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U6D95HdXhK4
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 04:51
  #5362 (permalink)  
 
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Mad 'Brits' ? no! do tell!!
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 09:05
  #5363 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
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I got stuck in Eket once with my Julius Berger Cessna 441 after I had jumped ship to work for zee Chermans, when my rotary-wing former colleagues kindly offered me their hospitality for the night, starting with that foul-mouthed parrot and carrying on with the bar, "Thermy," Peter Dove, and the rest of the gang .... It was, umm, interesting! Was Stacey there too then, or did I just imagine him?

At one point one of the local Lagos girlfriends used one of those state-of-the-art sewing machines that could reproduce designs, to make a clock face with " hell" in the same type-face and yellow color as "Shell." I didn't have the guts to put it in the bar in Isolo, but the guys in PH were happy to have it in House One.

That's where the two ex-pats were both bragging about their clever girlfriends, so clever that they were studying computer programming (with the usual funding from their boyfriends). It turned out to be the same girl collecting funding from two different boyfriends who were on back-to-back!

Another time, one ex-pat told another, "I really like the way you fixed up your basement." Yes, it turned out that he was keeping steady company with the other one's wife, since they were also on opposite rotations!

Then there was the pilot whose wife ran off with his accountant. Nothing daunted, he later proposed to his much younger girlfriend. She turned him down so that he ended up marrying her mother instead. PTSD, or just the dumb-ass? Who knows, and who cares?

We got all the characters passing through Lagos on transit. One afternoon "Mr Sport-f*cking" was there in the lounge, sprawled out asleep in a chair across from me as I read the Daily Telegraph from first page to last, both of us waiting for the magic hour of 18 when the bar opened. I glanced across then to see that his goolies were hanging out the bottom of his ragged shorts, when I began to think deeply about all the wrong choices that had set me upon my life's path ....
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 09:24
  #5364 (permalink)  
 
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I glanced across then to see that his goolies were hanging out the bottom of his ragged shorts..
I was either there that day, or had the misfortune to see the same sight another time!
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 10:55
  #5365 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Oct 1999
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Originally Posted by SASless View Post
Come on now NEO....some of us were Bachelors living in a Married Accompanied Operation....and had two locked gates and a Police Check Point to get through from our Digs on the World Renown Idugbo Estate in order to visit our Married friends on the Shell Camp.

Although compared to Colditiz in Port Harcourt....even Igdugbo was sheer luxury!




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U6D95HdXhK4
Hard to imagine it's a quarter of a century ago! Lots of familiar faces and scenes. Amongst the pilots I see the future Director of Shell Aircraft, the future head of aviation for Shell Nigeria, the future head of training for Brunei Shell Petroleum, and a future British Airways Captain......
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 12:32
  #5366 (permalink)  
 
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I was there Chuks!!
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 13:31
  #5367 (permalink)  
 
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Eket....an interesting place that I found much better in all regards as compared to Shell/Port Harcourt! It could be fun as there were colorful people to associate with after work.

Stacy can recall the evening at an upstairs Bar where I, for the first time ever, got to watch the "Wizard of Oz" from beginning to end.

The fishing offshore with Stacy and his partner in crime who was the very meek Casper Milk Toast kind of guy we all called "Basil".

Then there was Hyphen Smyth who was seen in a chain gang by a visiting Director as he was driven through town by the Managing Pilot.

There was always fun to be had with the Royal Navy Twins....Art and Paul. Art arrived in the Bar one night having crashed on his motorbike looking like someone had taken an Angle Grinder and Cricket Bat to him....only to continue with his drinking.

The Parrot was the Man....who had accurately described Murdoch as being a ******!

Ah....yes....the good old days of life at Eket on the downtown airstrip!

We are all better Men for the experience.
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 14:19
  #5368 (permalink)  

Nigerian In Law
 
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Rogues Gallery

212man,

Along with a guy who was blacklisted by Shell and another who ended up on the sex offenders register for possession of kiddie porn...........

NEO
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 14:23
  #5369 (permalink)  
 
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Oh, not sure I know who they might be.
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 14:30
  #5370 (permalink)  
 
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Or.....the Shell Warri Chief Pilot who murdered his Wife.

Or...the Pilot and Engineer who shared the same bicycle and wife.

Then there was the Chief Pilot who would fire you for having a local Girlfriend despite having an illegitimate child with his own local girlfriend.

What was the World Record for the shortest Tenure as a Chief Pilot at Warri....three days was it....when all the Nigerian Staff went on strike because of being called "Monkeys".

Of course we won't talk about the Queen who so enjoyed Lebanese.

There are a few flying tales that would be quite interesting....like how to get a transfer to Trinidad.....go out and cut down a set of power lines during an Air Test.

Gain a promotion to Ops Manager/Lagos by burning up an engine on a brand new aircraft.

There could be a book written about all this....but it would have to be in the Fiction section of the Library as no one would believe it true.
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 14:39
  #5371 (permalink)  
 
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Shall we rename the thread "What's Ancient History in West Africa"?
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 14:51
  #5372 (permalink)  
 
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Or.....the Shell Warri Chief Pilot who murdered his Wife.
Twice, wasn't it (two wives.....not same one twice!)

....like how to get a transfer to Trinidad.....go out and cut down a set of power lines during an Air Test.
Or spend three weeks in the Delta on an Ijaw funded cultural holiday...
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 16:02
  #5373 (permalink)  
 
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I don't remember any of these things at WT. Maybe I was asleep.

It was usually back from a long day at work under the delightful leadership of a real bona-fide French Count, then a proper afternoon tea with Earl Grey tea and little finger cakes on china cake stand, followed later by a fine continental dining experience as one feasted on food prepared in the immaculate kitchen (with floors so clean you could have eaten off them) prepared by an Italian-trained chef formerly of The Savoy Grille. This was then followed by a pleasant evening watching Harry Enfield and a cup of cocoa before a refreshing night's sleep on a Hypnos mattress in an immaculate room cooled by a gently-purring air conditioner with no mosquitoes, cockroaches or rats to disturb one's gentle slumbers.

Occasionally, if we had the energy, we'd accompany the Reverend Gaylord Fudgepacker IV to a meeting at a kitchen run by his aunty where poor local ladies who had fallen from grace went for prayer, forgiveness and succour.

What fun, genteel days.
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 16:32
  #5374 (permalink)  
 
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Oh....yes....and Bridge Night.

You should have shared a house with the Major where we had a wooden rack to store our Serviettes....and please never set the Table American Style as that is just not on, Dear Boy!

Many fond memories of entering the House after the end of the Day to be asked by the Major's Batman (and supposedly the House Steward/Cook)....."What for Dinner?".

Fond memories of seeing that smug little bastard peeking out between the Bars of the Jail Cell on Christmas Day after he copped one attitude too many. (The Batman!) although that description could apply to both.

I guess life in a British Army Officers Mess must leave a firm imprint.

Bristow was always a lot more fun when the RAF and Royal Navy ran the place.
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Old 26th Sep 2016, 17:06
  #5375 (permalink)  

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soggy,

Apart from Harry Enfield that reads like a day in the life of someone living in House 4........ The other ex-Majah.

NEO
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Old 27th Sep 2016, 20:34
  #5376 (permalink)  
 
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I see he found his meds and deleted his posts - or a grown up did.....
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Old 27th Sep 2016, 21:07
  #5377 (permalink)  

Nigerian In Law
 
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That Bloody Caps Lock.........

What post ? Shame we can't do that when we tell our wives things while drunk and they remember them 18 months later.
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Old 27th Sep 2016, 21:16
  #5378 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Oct 1999
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Originally Posted by Nigerian Expat Outlaw View Post
What post ? Shame we can't do that when we tell our wives things while drunk and they remember them 18 months later.
So many capitals, so little time, such small egos.....
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Old 27th Sep 2016, 22:46
  #5379 (permalink)  
 
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18 Months you say....only because you trade Wives every Year and a Half perhaps....mine makes an Elephant look absent minded!
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Old 28th Sep 2016, 00:05
  #5380 (permalink)  

Nigerian In Law
 
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"18 Months you say....only because you trade Wives every Year and a Half perhaps....mine makes an Elephant look absent minded!"

Luckily one of mine doesn't know where I live and the other is a good friend who re-married...... but she still quotes stuff I supposedly said years ago !

NEO
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