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How do you tell someone you won't fly them?

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How do you tell someone you won't fly them?

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Old 13th Apr 2009, 17:06
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How do you tell someone you won't fly them?

Talking to an acquaintance who has expressed an interest in being taken flying. After some discussion he says "oh by the way I'm frightened of flying". I investigate a bit further and he says he "freaked out" on a holiday jet.

So no way am I taking this guy as a passenger.

The politest way I could think of putting this was "sorry mate, I haven't been trained in how to deal with passengers who are frightened of flying, and one of the ways we stay alive is by not doing things we haven't been trained for".

Was there a better way of putting it?
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 17:20
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Don't tell them and if they do push the point always call it off saying the wx isn't good enough because you don't want to scare them again. And when they express disappointment suggest they go up with an instructor instead because they are used to deal with this sort of crap and they would get more out of it.

As an ex instructor I really would advise you not to get involved with this sort of problem. Most of us have a war story about having someone with a similar tale going daft on us. 99% of the time we can make a difference and all is well but the 1% are a pain in the arse. And I don't think you are the type to belt them round the head with the fire extinguisher.
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 17:21
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Tell him that you are just the same as he is over flying, and occasionaly freak out as well.
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 17:31
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Since you were having to make it up as you went along I think you did very well.

Out of curiosity, did you ask him why he wanted you to take him slying since he was scared of it? It crossed my mind he's a cheapskate and didn't want to pay for the commercial courses to help with it. That's assuming he know such courses exist.
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 18:42
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"Sorry mate, but if you freaked out on a commercial jet, chances are that you will freak out twice as hard, on a light aircraft, and that could get us both killed."

Originally Posted by mad_jock
Don't tell them and if they do push the point always call it off saying the wx isn't good enough
I can't stand all these little and big hypocrisies, but maybe it's just me (nothing personal, mad_jock). I don't see why grown-up people shouldn't be able to accept the simple truth - tactfully explained - without crying or resenting it (I am assuming that the guy in question is grown-up...)
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 19:01
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Tell him yes, of course he can come flying.
Suggest to him to take this sick bag, as you present him with an empty 25KG brown paper potato sack, tell him to take 2 as they fill up easily.
Take an odd look up at the clouds and mutter to yourself....f**k this is going to be rough, and say "hey mate" better go and use the bog before you get in..." have I mentioned your seat belt doesn't work and I only have one parachute, my last passenger has yet to be found with my last one... and you ain't bloody getting mine.
This usually assures them.
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 19:01
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As long as he will pay for it, take him! Its free flying for you!
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 19:14
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Or you could just be completely honest and use your original thought as the proper explanation, that way you've said it like it is - honesty is the best policy (most of the time).
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 19:42
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Friend

Just book him a trial lesson with the local school and let them deal with him. Job done!
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 20:46
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I don't understand this fear of flying, aeroplanes don't crash very often........just the once!

Seriously though, your friend needs a flying instructor who has experience with 'fear of flying' students. It is quite an involved task if you actually want them to come out the aircraft afterwards having been glad they got in to start with.

XO
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 22:36
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There is a big difference being scared stiff of flying and freaking out.
I took a friend who was scared stiff of flying and asked whether he could come along on a twin flight. he was an avid film maker and turned up with his camera. I took him along to help him but lost an engine at 200 feet in the climb out.

he calmy fimed the whole event from takeoff to touchdown and wanted to come on any trip he could after that experience.

Another guy a super cool racing driver who displayed no nerves whatsoever lost the plot big time and froze on the controls when I gave him control.
he refused to let go and literally froze solid.

Both the above are true.

So take him along but also a gun incase he does freak and you need to put him out of his misery

Pace
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Old 14th Apr 2009, 01:07
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I had a passenger panic on takeoff, in my previous PA28. His right leg stiffened and he basically kicked in full right rudder while I was still in ground effect. It was not fun. I had to whack him one and yell "get yer fecking legs off the pedals", I almost ran out of runway in a bird that wouldn't climb. When he finally took his leg off we straightened out and started climbing (as we all know the PA28-140 is a Drag Queen )

I makes sure I never miss out on "keep arms and legs away from the controls" in my pre-flight briefing now. Live and learn I guess, if you're lucky enough to live.

Nothing wrong with refusing a flight if you feel the passenger may be a major distraction from your main job.

Beech
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Old 14th Apr 2009, 01:56
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The only passenger I had freak was my wife. But of course that was before we were married, when she still would pretend that it was ok. Her freak out was not too bad, it was a bumpy takeoff from grass in a Grob 103. She kept saying "Oh my God, oh my God" funny part is she didn't realize she was saying it out loud. I found myself reaching for the release, then decided the safe thing was to get at least to pattern altitude. Once above the trees when it smoothed out she calmed down. Even with this 'easy' passenger freak out scenario, it adds a lot to your stress and workload. I would not want to have somebody lock on the controls. I would use the fire extinguisher. Better to not have left the ground.

What would you tell them? The truth.

-- IFMU
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Old 14th Apr 2009, 07:24
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Just tell him that if he's scared it's not a good idea for him to fly with you, but you can recommend a good instructor who could probably help him (if that's the case). But it's the way you say whatever you say that'll make the difference. Don't make a big deal out of it; just be very straightforward and honest and tell him the truth.
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Old 14th Apr 2009, 07:26
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Short and simple answer: just say "NO".

Long and a bit more complicated answer:
Once had similar request from a friend. This guy is a frequent LH flyer (for business), but scared of flying. Wanted to see how he would cope in a SEP. Now, he's a tall, strong guy, not someone you want to grab the controls and freeze. Solution came in the form of his girlfriend, who, by dint of fate, had been flying in little planes since childhood and loved it. So: girlfriend in the front right seat, the tall, scared one in the back. The drill was he would tell me immediately if anything felt wrong and I would head straight back to the airport, no questions asked. Guess what: the flight turned into a two-hour sightseeing trip which all three of us loved.

My guess (pure speculation, I have no proof for this) is, that many people who say they are scared of flying actually suffer from claustrophobia and/or some form of agoraphobia and hence feel very, very uncomfortable crammed into a metal tube with a lot of strangers. Add to that the feeling of being at someone's (the crew) mercy, and you got a recipe for 'freaking out' (especially on a holiday charter )

Being in a small a/c with big windows and a pilot they can talk to is different.
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Old 14th Apr 2009, 13:33
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Thanks all.
  • I note the suggestion to use the fire extinguisher, and will remember this if I ever need it.
  • When taking more than one passenger I already put the most experienced light aircraft passenger in the front.
  • I note, with no surprise, that nobody thinks I was wrong to say "no"!
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Old 14th Apr 2009, 14:12
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I note the suggestion to use the fire extinguisher
Lets hope the security bods at various airports don't read this

And it really can be the people you least expect that give you the most grief.

The nearest I got to belting someone was with a 70 year old 65kg granny. I am 105kg big lad and she refused point blank to surrender control on a trial flight. Wouldn't respond to anything I said and when I prised her hands off the controls 2 secs latter they were back on and I couldn't over power her on my set. In the end on approach I took a knuckle down the front of her chest while pitching the nose high. When she let go to stop me I pulled the seat adjuster and the seat went to the back of the track and she couldn't reach anything and I had to avoid her arms battering around as she struggled to try and get the seat forward again to be able to reach the controls. Landed and she never said another word and walked straight from the aircraft to her car without a backward glance.

Scuffles in the cockpit are bloody scary for any level of experience of pilot.
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Old 14th Apr 2009, 15:02
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I had somewhat of an opposite experience - while instructing in a far away land (about 15 years ago), I had a trial lesson where the prospective student explained that he flew model aircraft, knew everything about light aircraft and could fly "one of these little things" without any instruction. He assured me he could take off and land and really didn't need me there for anything.

I demonstrated the preflight, startup, taxi and runup and he tried to make it clear to me that I was wasting my time explaining this to him - he knew it all already...

I tried to explain the takeoff procedure (C-172) but he really wasn't interested (you've guessed it - already knew how to take off). I lined us up on the runway (5,000 feet long, 100 feet wide) and told him that he would be handling the controls (just the yoke - I did the power and pedals).

We started rolling down the runway, his hands confidently on the yoke and my right hand surreptitiously resting on my right knee when, suddenly, at about 50 kts, he recoiled into the fetal position screaming "oh my G-d, you take it...."

I climed up to about 2,500 and slowly re-introducted him to the controls - funnily enough, he was slightly less arrogant.
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Old 14th Apr 2009, 15:17
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Gertrude,

I would be interested to know the extent of the "freaking out" - did he/she say in what way they "freaked out"? Some people sit quietly and freak whilst others get more physical and it's those latter ones you want to avoid taking up. Even as an instructor I would be very cautious about taking someone up whom I knew had a history of "freaking out" and would simply question their motives for wishing to subject themselves to that same trauma again because to my relatively sane mind it doesn't add up, eg; I hate spiders and would not wish to touch one!

The bottom line as already highlighted by Mad_Jock is that if there's any doubt then don't do it.

VFE.
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Old 14th Apr 2009, 15:28
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I would be interested to know the extent of the "freaking out" - did he/she say in what way they "freaked out"?
Didn't ask - I'd already heard enough and decided:
that if there's any doubt then don't do it.
I'm not qualified to judge that sort of thing, am I.
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