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£3,200 fag

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Old 27th Jul 2007, 12:29
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£3,200 fag

Just had this emailed to me, bit of a chuckle.

"TRAVELLING with a budget airline can drive anyone to drugs, from the sub-human staff to the inevitable battle with fellow cheapskates for the best seats. and for one Martin Rose, the need for a cheeky ciggie proved too great and too costly.

The 36-year-old was on a Ryanair flight from Girona when the craving for his old friend Mr Nicotine grew too strong. Rose, of Cleveland, was initially warned by a stewardess after being spotted with a cigarette and lighter in his hand in the Boeing 737.

However, the renegade smoker still proceeded to lock himself in the loo and enjoy his illicit smoke. When a sated Rose eventually opened the door again, cabin crew noticed a haze of smoke as well as that distinct aroma wafting from the cubicle.

Prosecutor Justin Bullas told Doncaster’s Justice of the Peace: “The cubicle was searched, the smoke alarm was covered up with a napkin and the ash was in the sink.”

Ross was fined the maximum £2,500 plus £700 costs.

With those skills of deception, Ross shouldn't expect a call from MI5 any day soon."

Last edited by paulkinm; 27th Jul 2007 at 12:48.
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 12:35
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And quite right too! Muppet...
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 12:45
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Now, my maths aint great, but that was a £3200 fag !
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 12:48
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Opps! Slight input error there! All done now.
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 12:56
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Was on a Japanese flight many moons ago when some airlines were non-smoking and some weren't. On noting that my seat was way down the back of the a/c I confirmed with the cabin attendant that I was, indeed, in a non-smoking seat. The wrong end of various sticks were grabbed due to the language barrier, with the result that every 15 minutes for the entire flight the lady handed me another fake plastic cigarette to suck on.
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 12:58
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"from the sub-human staff"

Where was the original text lifted from?
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 13:09
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He got off lightly!

Air Canada DC-9 was approximately 25 miles northwest of Cincinnati when controllers at the Federal Aviation Administration center in Indianapolis heard the pilot's calmly spoken words: "I have a fire on board." It was shortly after 7 p.m. Thursday, and Flight 797, carrying 41 passengers and a crew of five from Dallas and Fort Worth to Toronto, had smoke creeping forward through the cabin from a rear lavatory.

Air space was quickly cleared for the jetliner to land at the nearest airport, Greater Cincinnati International in Covington, Ky. In the 17 minutes it took to reach the runway, the crew shepherded passengers to the front of the 101-seat plane; some on board held napkins and wet cloths to their faces against the choking fumes. By the time of touchdown, so much smoke had filled the cockpit that Pilot Don Cameron could not see his controls.

On landing, four tires blew out as the pilot braked to a stop. When the jetliner screeched to a halt, the forward passenger door flew open, sucking in oxygen and releasing smoke. Though well prepared by the crew for emergency evacuation, passengers had barely 30 seconds to slide down rubber emergency chutes and run 100 ft. before the fuselage erupted in flames. Said one survivor: "Five minutes before landing, we couldn't see anything in the plane for the smoke. It was the kind of situation where you expect someone to scream, but no one did."

Despite the crew's best efforts, 23 passengers, some of them still in their seats, were found dead after the blaze was extinguished by 19 pieces of fire equipment surrounding the plane. It was the first loss of life in a commercial airline accident since Jan. 11, when three crew members of a United Airlines cargo jet were killed when it crashed into a swamp near Detroit just after takeoff.

Questions about how the fire started and generated such acrid smoke through the DC-9 began to arise even as a makeshift morgue was set up at the airport to identify the bodies, some of which were badly charred. A team from the National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB), the FAA and the FBI arrived to sift through the ruins of the plane for clues. NTSB officials suspect that the fire may have been started by a cigarette in a back-cabin lavatory
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 13:22
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"NTSB officials suspect that the fire may have been started by a cigarette in a back-cabin lavatory"

That is bollox.
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 13:32
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You seem to be having a bad day SLFguy. Do you have anything to offer besides curt remarks?
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 13:35
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Just sayin how it is...for sake the report ain't that hard to find....
We lambast the press for inaccuracies, (see his statement above), and sensationalism, (see his statement above), and then crud like that gets posted.
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 13:51
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Who are "we"?
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 13:58
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SLF Guy

"NTSB officials suspect that the fire may have been started by a cigarette in a back-cabin lavatory"

That is bollox.


The Chairman of the National Transportation Safety Board is Mark V. Rosenker. 490 L'Enfant Plaza, SW. Washington, DC 20594. (202) 314-6000

He'll be delighted to receive the benefit of your wisdom.
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 14:51
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Sorry, forget but I'm with SLFguy on this. Mainly because the final accident report never determined the source of the fire. Check for yourself here:

NTSB accident report
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 14:55
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Which bit is baffling you?

NTSB officials suspect that the fire may have been started by a cigarette in a back-cabin lavatory.

...... concludes that the possibility that this occurred cannot be ruled out.

PS.

Check for yourself here: NTSB accident report
The cutting I pasted is from that very report. Conclusion - l may already have seen it.

Last edited by forget; 27th Jul 2007 at 15:05.
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Old 27th Jul 2007, 16:45
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Originally Posted by forget
Which bit is baffling you?
NTSB officials suspect that the fire may have been started by a cigarette in a back-cabin lavatory.
...... concludes that the possibility that this occurred cannot be ruled out.
Your comprehension of English appears to be distorted by your desire to prove something which is in fact unproven.

Not ruling out a possibility is not akin to suspecting it to be the cause. And the NTSB didn't even do that (see may).
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Old 29th Jul 2007, 21:47
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"He'll be delighted to receive the benefit of your wisdom"

I doubt it...I only read his report...
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Old 2nd Aug 2007, 14:55
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I haven't heard of anyone being so desperate to have a fag though! Even the pee heads that come back from Central European stag parties, whom are still blotto, have a sense of containment!
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