Stupidist radio call
Many years at Jandakot a colleague had changed jobs and was working from an organisation at the other end of the field...
Tower "Clear to land, full length is available"
Pilot "No thanks buddy, I take it up the other end now"
Same ATC had an open mic while having some kind of unidentified pleasant experience...when he finally closed the mic a voice was heard on Ground
"I'll have what he's having"
Tower "Clear to land, full length is available"
Pilot "No thanks buddy, I take it up the other end now"
Same ATC had an open mic while having some kind of unidentified pleasant experience...when he finally closed the mic a voice was heard on Ground
"I'll have what he's having"
I’m a Captain at R something x and I don’t do it, nor does any FO that I have ever flown with. If they did I would be using my best CRM skills to make the point that it’s not correct.
Even more intriguing - Maybe I’ve the airline wrong, in which case I’d unreservedly apologise to those who fly for the one starting with R and ending with x.
Do you do much flying around Western NSW/Northern Victoria?
Do you do much flying around Western NSW/Northern Victoria?
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“Fully ready”
I would like to call the tower one day, and say "partially ready". That would, in one fell swoop, demonstrate the stupidity of the "fully ready".
Don't get me started on the "request traffic". Or the "request squawk code".
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Many years ago in a far off place to our north got cleared off HF to call the tower at 30 miles.
Me banjiwhatsname tower VHxyz 30 miles inbound.
Tower Vhxyz cleared to land
Ah not much traffic thinks me.
10 miles out there is obviously lots of traffic.
Me: tower VHxyz confirm cleared to land?
Tower: Vhxyz cleared to land
Me: there is a lot of traffic
Tower: yes, they are also cleared to land
Me banjiwhatsname tower VHxyz 30 miles inbound.
Tower Vhxyz cleared to land
Ah not much traffic thinks me.
10 miles out there is obviously lots of traffic.
Me: tower VHxyz confirm cleared to land?
Tower: Vhxyz cleared to land
Me: there is a lot of traffic
Tower: yes, they are also cleared to land
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Maybe it starts at the top?
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That is because many pilots called ready when they were not fully ready to try and jump the queue. ATC noticed this and came up with the response Are you fully ready. So an own goal for lying basically! 
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Probably worth mentioning that the "numbers" is not a chat frequency and not for swapping s#~*t.
http://www.airservicesaustralia.com/...ip/general.pdf
AIP GEN 3.4-4
3.1.5 Interpilot Air-to-Air Communication. In accordance with regional agreements, 123.45MHZ is designated as the air-to-air VHF communications channel. Use of this channel will enable aircraft engaged in flights over remote and oceanic areas out of range of VHF ground stations to exchange necessary operational information and to facilitate the resolution of operational problems.
http://www.airservicesaustralia.com/...5-Nov-2012.pdf
ERSA NAVIGATION AND COMMUNICATIONS NAV/COMM-1
4. AIR-TO-AIR COMMUNICATIONS - CIVIL
4.1 Interpilot air-to-air communications in Australian FIRs may be conducted on frequency 123.45MHZ. Communications between aircraft on this frequency are restricted to the exchange of information relating to aircraft operations. Communications are to be established by either a directed call to a specific aircraft or a general call, taking into account conditions pertaining to the use of the particular channel. As target aircraft may be guarding more than one frequency, the initial call should include the distinctive channel identification "INTERPILOT" or identification of the air-to-air frequency.
Kaz
http://www.airservicesaustralia.com/...ip/general.pdf
AIP GEN 3.4-4
3.1.5 Interpilot Air-to-Air Communication. In accordance with regional agreements, 123.45MHZ is designated as the air-to-air VHF communications channel. Use of this channel will enable aircraft engaged in flights over remote and oceanic areas out of range of VHF ground stations to exchange necessary operational information and to facilitate the resolution of operational problems.
http://www.airservicesaustralia.com/...5-Nov-2012.pdf
ERSA NAVIGATION AND COMMUNICATIONS NAV/COMM-1
4. AIR-TO-AIR COMMUNICATIONS - CIVIL
4.1 Interpilot air-to-air communications in Australian FIRs may be conducted on frequency 123.45MHZ. Communications between aircraft on this frequency are restricted to the exchange of information relating to aircraft operations. Communications are to be established by either a directed call to a specific aircraft or a general call, taking into account conditions pertaining to the use of the particular channel. As target aircraft may be guarding more than one frequency, the initial call should include the distinctive channel identification "INTERPILOT" or identification of the air-to-air frequency.
Kaz
Many years ago in a far off place to our north got cleared off HF to call the tower at 30 miles.
Me banjiwhatsname tower VHxyz 30 miles inbound.
Tower Vhxyz cleared to land
Ah not much traffic thinks me.
10 miles out there is obviously lots of traffic.
Me: tower VHxyz confirm cleared to land?
Tower: Vhxyz cleared to land
Me: there is a lot of traffic
Tower: yes, they are also cleared to land
Me banjiwhatsname tower VHxyz 30 miles inbound.
Tower Vhxyz cleared to land
Ah not much traffic thinks me.
10 miles out there is obviously lots of traffic.
Me: tower VHxyz confirm cleared to land?
Tower: Vhxyz cleared to land
Me: there is a lot of traffic
Tower: yes, they are also cleared to land
Ledslud's ICAO procedures, obviously!
Saves unnecessary radio chatter, don't ya know!!
Seriously, after all these years, don't you think it's time you accepted that ICAO/FAA/UK CAA/NATS etc (particularly in light of the adverse audits/inquiries on CASA/Airservices over the years) actually know what they are doing, and you, in your own little world, might not be the ultimate oracle on all matters aviation.
Tootle pip!!
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Heard every single day on Tower frequency in most Asian major airports:
Tower: "XXX 123 SURFACE WIND 350 at 15 knots gusting to 25 knots, cleared to land runway 21 left"
XXX 123: "XXX 123 surface wind 350 at 15 knots gusting to 25 knots, cleared to land runway 21 left"
DUH
Tower: "XXX 123 SURFACE WIND 350 at 15 knots gusting to 25 knots, cleared to land runway 21 left"
XXX 123: "XXX 123 surface wind 350 at 15 knots gusting to 25 knots, cleared to land runway 21 left"
DUH
Heard everyday on all Australian airports and radio frequencies, pilots reading back verbatim what ATC have instructed them to do. A clearance is required to be read back, an instruction just needs to be acknowledged with the call sign.