Antipodean CO who was a fat, pyscotic pr**k of man known by all of his subordinates as TOL - Tub of Lard. The 2 ice cream was equally overweight and obnoxious and was affectionately(sic) known as SOTOL - Son of....

Slightly off topic but the Airbus A320 was given the nickname "John Wayne" after an asian airline crashed one on approach to Kathmandu a few years ago.
I couldn't work out why either until someone asked me "John Wayne, Didnt he climb hills, chop down trees and kill Indians?"

No Offence meant - honest!

He may think he's shaken this one, but LSB used to think he was strangely nicknamed Low Speed Buffet.

Little Smug B*****d to everyone else!

Well if GPS thought we were complementing his navigation then hope he reads this. The standard process while an Officer Cadet on sea training from Dartmouth has everyone doing his part of the taskbook work then copying the rest from a mate. GPS got the best marks by lending out his work with deliberate errors, then correcting his errors when other people had already copied it. Hence, GPS.

At JEFTS (Joint Elimentary Flying Training) even before he arrived his name became a tri-service watchword for doing things for yourself - if you made your own tea and didn't ask if anyone else wanted one you were a "tea B*******e". So much so that when he did arrive crabs who didn't know him said it when he was around :).

TOBWARi

Is Ferengi still inside? I'm not, and have been busy on an ATPL course so am a bit out of touch. I may be able to guess who you are, and if I say I failed AFT at the end of the course on Mk6, you may be able to guess me, and even recognise my contribution above (he would have been a term behind you at BRNC).

In addition:
A folically challanged guy aboard a ship I was once on "fivehead" - it was like a forehead, only bigger!
And I once made the mistake of asking a guy in my new flight why he was called UMF - apparently it stood for Ugly Mother F*****
And at College a guy called Nick Alcock, soon got nicknamed "Noballs"
Oh and 2 fat guys on a lynx flight were known as LARD flight. "lynx aircrew requiring diet"

Thats all folks :-)

Guy I fly with now, is ex Tremblers (mid 90's)
I would love to know what his nickname was!

Any helpers?

Stik

A particularly obnoxious Kipper Fleet driver was debriefed on his nickname around the squadron - BLC. "Dunno what you're talking about boss, news to me!" It stands for Bumptious Little C***! Said BLC went to another Sqn where they didn't like BLC, so they renamed him TCL - That C*** L**. Anagram for BLC is Evil Dead. You know who you are!

Another was BRIAN. Stood for Bru*e Robb is a N*b. (well BRIAK was never going to work!)

FIAT.... Fr8$er is a Tw*t!
etc etc

And let's not forget about 10 yrs ago at Linton - UMITAF - Ugliest Man in the Air Force

Female pilot going through Shawbury about 6 yrs ago (now multis I believe) - LLAMFLAM

Looks like a moose flys like a moose

...an Aircrewman observer known to all as 'Vasco' - after that other famous navigator...

...Lynx pilot known openly as 'Bullet' - later known as SABOT, 'cos they're even quicker...

...an exchange crab with an occasional unfortunate speech difficulty known widely as '44Foxtrot'...

...'OSLO' - Outer Space Liaison Officer...

...and the John Wayne post reminded me that we used to call the old shiny loo paper by the same handle, as it was rough, tough and it didn't take s%@t off anybody...

love this thread!

NAVAL TYPE PROUD TO BE KNOWN AS TC (TOP CAT) NOT IT WAS REALLY TWO CELLS

Catflap. Swings both ways, but ultimately, designed for pussy. (FC, obviously.)

you may know ah kid!
ROLF.
Right obnoxious little fuc*er!! :mad:

A WRAF I knew on 8 Sqn was called 'Turtle', 'cos when she was on her back she was f**ked ... !!

... she had a little mate of hers, who was equally accommodating, known to all and sundry as 'Terrapin' !!

Knew a girl nick named 'SAM' (after a surface to air missile )

Coz once you were in her sights you were £ucked !

------------------

a couple of aussie WO gems...
FONC "Friend Of No C**t", and
FINKL "F*****g Idiot No C**t Likes"
standart Aussie understatement, wouldnt you say?

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clear in live

Back in VGS days we had a Nimrod (cos he was always on the lookout for something wet), a Charisma (bypass)
and Wilt....1 look at her and you wilted!

Im sure there were others, but i cant remember.....most seem to be common though

There was a delightful girl on my IOT course called "Clang", because that was the sound the shovel had made when it hit her face.

A chap at Waddo was called "Thrush" because he was an irritating C***.

Two girly nav studes at Finningley were asked to do recce briefs on consecutive mornings. Subjects: "Squat-eye" and "Flatface". Purely coincidental I'm sure.

Here you go, Back 5.

Is this what you are looking for!

Another from the Kipper Fleet :
AEO so loved by all, he is known as TFO (pronounced TEE-FOE):
Stands for "Table For One"
you know who you are!!

Now a Wg Cdr I believe,

T4 aka T***y Toilet The T**t.

Popular chap.......

A Leeming Lovely from a few yrs ago was known as "Monkey Bum-Head". Sad thing was, that description was quite inspired.

A bloke in my company spends all of his time in the hotel to save his allowances. Known as The Olympic Torch: travels all the way round the world and never goes out.

Used to have an Officer Commanding, went by the handle of "Claymore"

He was "anti-personnel" Bugger me he's a General now!

I knew a Navy beefer a few years back who was known as "Splunk".
His real name was Sleman.

And then there's Crab beefer Steve "Wang" Carr.

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tee-head

Old Squadron CO from the '80s known as PILL

.........Small, round and no conception!!

Very apt.

Chap I used to know was called Hymen, he thought it was because of his prowess at deflowering virgins, I don't think he ever twigged it was actually because he was a complete c**t.

If we've had them already I apologise;

MUPPET- Most useless pilot pusser ever trained

SPIN-Shortest Pilot in Nato

Two Dads- anyone with hyphenated name

SEAL - short for imbecile.

Knew another SPIN - he thought it was Shortest Person In NATO - Shortest Prick In NATO never worked it out.

Also a mate of mine went through a course with a guy they called 'Newark' - he worked out it was an anagram on the last day.

Slinky - everyone has an urge to throw them down the stairs.

Crewroom nicknames
 

The tv prog this week Heroes of the Skies featured a USAF F4 squadron commanded by Robin Olds ( who seems to be a bit of a legend). One of his pilots rejoiced in the name of Everett Raspberry. Which got me thinking...

What would have his nom de guerre have been?
What is the most OTT crewroom nickname you gave encountered?

A newly 'Posted In' walked into a Ballykelly crewroom and was asked where his last posting had been. He said "St Eval": and added, "and I hope my nickname doesn't follow me!"

Someone looked up from his cards and said "Why, what did they call you?"

He said "Noddy".

We all said - "Hello Noddy!!"

One of my best mates is known is known as Noddy... Known throughout the Regiment...

Why's he called Noddy? Because he's got Big Ears... :}

Newly arrived Chinook Pilot....on his second Combat Tour to Vietnam....when some one pointed him out and said...."That's the New Guy!".....the New Guy copped an attitude suggesting he was no f@cking New Guy....he was Second Tour.

To this day we still call him ...... "New Guy"!

RamsDog
 

Some old RN SHAR pilots would recall 'RamsDog'? Long story short this nickname remained with RamsDog throughout his long illustrious (first to deck land a SHAR on same 24 June 1982) RAN career with short sojourn in RN FAA in late 1970s-early 1980s. RamsDog gained this nickname, known to his peers before even joining the RANC (origin is completely innocuous) but it was such a nickname that it was lifelong. Vale RamsDog.

A PDF (or two) about RamsDog (Dave Ramsay) is here in 'Documents Various' folder on SpazSinbad SkyDrive page:

https://skydrive.live.com/?cid=cbcd6...340707E6%21116

"My name's Phil, but my mates call me W****"

"Hello Phil!!"

Some nicknames from my maritime days:

"Two-dicks"
"Flash" - who later become "Zulu" (as he was one hour behind everyone else :E)
"Fingers"

Mr Muttitt used to delight in swapping the more obvious nicknames around...

e.g. 'Spud' White and 'Chalky' Murphy. 'Spud' stuck for many years!

Robin Olds 2IC was "Chappie" James..

The pair were known as "Blackman and Robin"..

A crewroom conversation at Leeming, with a new arrival.

"So mate, what's your nickname?"

"Well, they used to call me 'Diesel Bob,' because I refuelled a petrol landy with diesel twice, but I don't like that nickname"

"Ok, nice to meet you 'Diesel Bob.":ugh:

P1

At some flying training school. one of the QFIs was holding court about speaking foreign languages. After about 10 minutes of boring the rest of the crewroom fartless with this, his colleagues became rather fed up....

"Well, do you speak another language?", they asked him.
"Of course I do. I speak Swahili!", he bragged.
"OK - what's err, 'dangerous snake' in Swahili?"
"Hatari nyoka"
"Deep river?"
"Kina mto"
"Stupid baboon?"
"Kijinga nugu"
"Well then, nugu, it looks like you've earned yourself a new nickname!"

And 'Noogs' he duly became!