Amyl acetate I'll have you know. And don't get me started on the merits of dioproplene glycol monomethyl ether when it comes to simulating nerve agent.

On one fighter squadron, the pilots went over to the rockapes for annual GDT / ODT / CCS (or whatever TLA was in vogue for the gas 'n guns session in those days).

When it came to the respirator test session, one of the pilot refused to go into the chamber..

"I do not go into the gas chamber"
"But, sir, it's a requirement"
"I do not go into the gas chamber!"
"Why not, sir?"
"I do not go into the gas chamber - I operate the gas chamber. Like my father did in 1942....."

He was, of course, a Luftwaffe exchange mate who had an excellent sense of humour - and no, his father hadn't operated gas chambers in the Third Reich.

On Friday shareholders, when introduced to the rest of the squadron, he opened with a dead pan Harry Enfield 'Jürgen the German' - "I feel I must apologise for the conduct of my nation in the war!", which had the place in hysterics, I'm told.