In Dec 2000, I was doing a combined 'Flight Cat' and 'AAR Role Cat' on a squadron Captain, who needed the check as the last element necessary to be upgraded to 'B' Cat / Above the Average. We did the AAR, a PD to Waddington, then some circuits at Brize, finally landing on what had become a nasty wet December evening. 4½ hours of pretty hard work for him!

As we taxyed in, I could vaguely make out more than just the usual crew van waiting. The GE came on intercom and announced that the Stn Cdr was on his way up to the flight deck, which had us wondering. He also added "Message from the boss, did the trip go OK?" An odd request, but I said it had been absolutely fine. Then the Stn Cdr appeared on the flight deck looking furious and proceeded to bawl me out over some alleged serious complaint from ATC, which had me doing the proverbial 'guppy fish at feeding time' impression. Then, without pausing for breath, he turned to the other pilot, who was also looking equally nonplussed and said "And as for you, O'****n, how dare you fly one of my station's aircraft improperly dressed!". As my colleague began to open his mouth in astonishment, the Stn Cdr thrust a pair of Sqn Ldr rank slides at him and ripped the Flt Lt ones off his epaulettes - then roared with laughter at his 100% successful wind up. It seems he'd discovered some little known 'manning' clause in the Blunty Bible, allowing him to promote people ahead of their appearance on the official list and had decided to use it on this occasion. Which was thoroughly well deserved, I hasten to add.

As my newly promoted, newly B-Cat'd chum was recovering from the shock, a hand appeared with a glass of something fizzy. His Flt Cdr and a couple of colleagues had been in the crew van with bottles and glasses at the ready, so once we'd signed off the jet to the GE as being, as usual, 100% serviceable, we had a most excellent crew debrief.

Oh - and we hadn't upset ATC either. Kelvin had me completely fooled on that!