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Iceland

Old 13th Oct 2008, 13:59
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Iceland

So, if the Ruskies are gonna bail the very desperate Iceland out to the tune of £4bn-or-so with a loan, is Russia gonna want something in return, apart from a **** load of interest?

I know the Yanks have left Iceland now and there was casual gossip last week in the FT of Iceland offering Russia a Naval base in return for the cash, but is that really a possibility?

How does that stand with NATO obligations, etc?
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Old 13th Oct 2008, 14:04
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Red Storm Rising?
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Old 13th Oct 2008, 14:50
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Wondered when people would begin to realise that Iceland is bought and paid for now..those nice Russians will have somewhere to park in the North Atlantic at last!!
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Old 13th Oct 2008, 14:54
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Remember the Cod War. We should have finished them pesky Icelanders off then
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Old 13th Oct 2008, 15:10
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Remember the Cod War. We should have finished them pesky Icelanders off then
Surely its not too late. Its the perfect opportunity to get some use out of The Andrew. Couple of Tridents, jobs a good 'un.

Best ask those sterling chaps of the Senior Service to leave their iPods at home though, best to avoid any portable music device related unpleasantness.
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Old 13th Oct 2008, 15:38
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A couple of Tridents? Overkill, surely? Perhaps a Tomahawk or two would do the job. The Russians won't stay long when they discover that a beer costs £7.00

pintprice.com - The price of beer in Iceland
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Old 13th Oct 2008, 15:50
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No use a Trident.

Its not as if we want to live on Iceland, we already have a cold, wet and windy lump of rock in the South Atlantic. All we need to do is stop the Russians wanting to live there and it'll give the Navy something useful to do.

Of course if it can get them to leave the French Alps alone in winter holdfast on the Trident and let the Russians have the place.
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Old 13th Oct 2008, 16:13
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It's all slowly unwinding for America, isn't it? I'm undecided as to whether this will be a good thing for the planet or not...
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Old 13th Oct 2008, 16:20
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I can assure you that there are some very good reasons to visit Iceland.......

Here are just 2:



I wouldn't mind seizing those assets!

..and don't forget that, in summer, there are only 2 hobbies in Iceland:
  • Fishing
  • F*cking

But in winter, there is no fishing.....
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Old 13th Oct 2008, 16:48
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Yes but then there's Kerry Katona, or is that a different Iceland???
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Old 13th Oct 2008, 18:20
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And that mad cow Bjork.

Sounds like a hump back whale giving birth.

Google her, Beags, but for God's sake don't listen to any of her "work''.

It'll spook the horses.

If she looked like those two lovelies, then fine. But sadly she resembles an Inuit elder who's been running after busses too fast, trying to bite the tyres.
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Old 13th Oct 2008, 18:29
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But sadly she resembles an Inuit elder who's been running after busses too fast, trying to bite the tyres.
Or as if someone had set fire to her face and then put it out with a shovel.
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Old 13th Oct 2008, 19:04
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No, that description belongs to the hideous 'Pang'. In contrast to whom, as befits a female whose name begins with BJ (), BJörk once had something about her:


Before she went weird:

In her teens, Björk was influenced by punk; at 14 she formed the all-girl punk band Spit and Snot, shortly followed by the jazz fusion group Exodus in 1979. In 1980 she graduated from music school. In 1981 she and bassist Jakob Magnússon formed another band called Jam-80, which later became Tappi Tíkarrass (which means "Cork the Bitch’s Arse" in Icelandic).
She sounds like a nice girl. The sort you'd take home to meet Mum?

Later, in 2002, one of her performance 'works' was described thus:

In a white bodysuit and with bleached eyebrows, Björk conjurs red translucent threads to shoot from her bosom and enwrap her in a cocoon, while she sings passionately about a newly found love.
Riiiiiiiiiggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhtttttttt........

Humpback whales humping, more like!
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Old 13th Oct 2008, 21:15
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But sadly she resembles an Inuit elder who's been running after busses too fast, trying to bite the tyres.
Monty, you owe me for the medical bills I have just incurred having my tits sewn back on. That is the funniest thing I have read in ages!

Seriously though, look at BEagle's pic above, then tell me you wouldn't?
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Old 14th Oct 2008, 11:46
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Seriously, no.

Having got you in the sack, she is probably capable of anything, like tying you up and suggesting the introduction of raw cods heads and sandpaper to 'liven things up'.

Far better a 2v1 with Beags's pair of lovelies.
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Old 14th Oct 2008, 16:40
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May I be boring for a moment;

get the crumpet over here ' for safety's sake ' then just maintain the SOSUS net a la Red Storm Rising - shouldn't take much to keep the locals going, they seem to live on Bird Heads etc;

I knew an English couple who spent two years there - when they came back and I took them for a pub meal of Shepard's pie, veg & chips, they almost wet themselves with glee !!!

DZ
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Old 14th Oct 2008, 17:20
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ATG to Iceland. NEO of the good lookers. Leave Bjork Ashore as a form of air warning siren. ATG makes for Clyde. V boat gets into position (Arun Trench close enough) Gas, steam doors open, things spinning, things get Airborne. Instant sunshine in Iceland - it must be dark there all day long by now so we're doing them a favour.. Back in time for beers in Hellenbrough. Bus the Good lookers down from Glenmallon when ATG ties up and the good lookers get chucked out of the wardroom/female stoker's mess.

Jobs a goodun..
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Old 14th Oct 2008, 17:28
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Yes but then there's Kerry Katona, or is that a different Iceland???
Damn having only just read this thread, hardly surprising that someone already came up with that one.

That said, given the magnitude of their respective financial problems, I think it might be cheaper to bail out Iceland!
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Old 15th Oct 2008, 09:23
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The answer's no

Tedious after all that I realise, but to answer Harrogate's original question - no, the Russians won't be getting Keflavik. Not yet anyway.

(Abba? Iceland?)
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Old 15th Oct 2008, 09:43
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Yeah.

Like Geir Haarde's in a position to bargain.

Ruskies will be there inside 3 years.
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