Ribald comments on CR's
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Ribald comments on CR's
Having seen a paper version of this in the office today I have cobbled together a few less than PC comments for PPRuNe that you hope wouldn't appear on your CR.
ON YOUR CR ?
This officer has delusions of adequacy.
As a failure, this soldier is a great success.
This soldier has reached rock bottom since his last CR. Now he has started digging.
This sailor would be out of his depth in a car park puddle.
This officer should request a refund from his university.
This soldier is so dense, light bends around him
If you give this soldier a penny for her thoughts, you'd get change.
Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; this officer only gargled.
If you stand close enough to this sailor, you can hear the ocean.
In the pinball game of life, this airman's flippers are further apart than most.
It takes this man 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes.
This soldier works well under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.
When this officer opens her mouth it is only to change whichever foot was previously there.
This signaller's antenna doesn't pick up terrestrial channels.
A LOOSE SCREW, MAYBE ?
A brick shy of a full hod.
A few beads short in the rosary.
A few feathers short of a whole duck.
A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.
A prime candidate for natural de-selection.
A photographic memory - with the lens cover glued on.
A room temperature IQ.
A Titanic intellect ... in a world full of icebergs.
All Preparation, no H.
An ace short of a full deck.
An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
An intellect rivalled only by garden tools.
As bright as Alaska in December.
As smart as fishbait.
Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
Has two brains; one is AWOL and the other is out looking for it.
Fell out of the stupid tree and then hit every branch on the way down.
If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate.
A neuron short of a synapse.
Somewhere some cow's udder is missing a tit.
Which village is missing its idiot?
The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's expired.
CHALLENGED ?
Body off Baywatch, face off Crimewatch.
Got into the shallow end of the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.
His family tree obviously doesn't fork.
I would not allow this soldier to breed.
ON YOUR CR ?
This officer has delusions of adequacy.
As a failure, this soldier is a great success.
This soldier has reached rock bottom since his last CR. Now he has started digging.
This sailor would be out of his depth in a car park puddle.
This officer should request a refund from his university.
This soldier is so dense, light bends around him
If you give this soldier a penny for her thoughts, you'd get change.
Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; this officer only gargled.
If you stand close enough to this sailor, you can hear the ocean.
In the pinball game of life, this airman's flippers are further apart than most.
It takes this man 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes.
This soldier works well under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.
When this officer opens her mouth it is only to change whichever foot was previously there.
This signaller's antenna doesn't pick up terrestrial channels.
A LOOSE SCREW, MAYBE ?
A brick shy of a full hod.
A few beads short in the rosary.
A few feathers short of a whole duck.
A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.
A prime candidate for natural de-selection.
A photographic memory - with the lens cover glued on.
A room temperature IQ.
A Titanic intellect ... in a world full of icebergs.
All Preparation, no H.
An ace short of a full deck.
An experiment in Artificial Stupidity.
An intellect rivalled only by garden tools.
As bright as Alaska in December.
As smart as fishbait.
Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
Has two brains; one is AWOL and the other is out looking for it.
Fell out of the stupid tree and then hit every branch on the way down.
If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate.
A neuron short of a synapse.
Somewhere some cow's udder is missing a tit.
Which village is missing its idiot?
The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's expired.
CHALLENGED ?
Body off Baywatch, face off Crimewatch.
Got into the shallow end of the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.
His family tree obviously doesn't fork.
I would not allow this soldier to breed.
Taken from recent court case involving Army Cpl. Her OC wrote on her annual appraisal.'I would rather sit sipping ######### round Michael Barrymores pool than promote this girl'. She took offence and sued.
Join Date: Jan 2006
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Once upon a time..............
A CO included in one of his officer's reports
"I have never seen this officer sober"; this was referred back to the CO by higher authority as being too damning and he was required to amend the entry. He did so by deleting the "never".
A CO included in one of his officer's reports
"I have never seen this officer sober"; this was referred back to the CO by higher authority as being too damning and he was required to amend the entry. He did so by deleting the "never".
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The age old, but true, CR by a cavalry CO:
I would not breed from this officer.
And from a RAF flying CO:
This pilot should not be authorised to fly below 250 feet.
And:
This officer sets himself low personal standards which he consistently fails to achieve.
And:
His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity.
I would not breed from this officer.
And from a RAF flying CO:
This pilot should not be authorised to fly below 250 feet.
And:
This officer sets himself low personal standards which he consistently fails to achieve.
And:
His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity.
Some idiot once wrote about a hooting, roaring confirmed singly who was always in the poo:
"Bloggs is one of nature's confirmed bachelors"
Being the sort of poorly educated, common oik who often ends up getting promoted in the RAF, what the idiot didn't realise was this was a Victorian euphemism and was tantamount to writing:
"Bloggs is a poof"
NB - This was before Pink Wednesday and could have had severe repercussions in those days!
"Bloggs is one of nature's confirmed bachelors"
Being the sort of poorly educated, common oik who often ends up getting promoted in the RAF, what the idiot didn't realise was this was a Victorian euphemism and was tantamount to writing:
"Bloggs is a poof"
NB - This was before Pink Wednesday and could have had severe repercussions in those days!
Ecce Homo! Loquitur...
Flt Lt .... has the appearance of a sicilian organ grinder, and the morals of his monkey.
Flt Lt .... performs his duties to his own satisfaction.
Flt Lt .... performs his duties to his own satisfaction.
SAC Bloggs is a fine tradesman with considerable potential for development, if only he would stop attacking RAF Policemen.
I did not know one end of a horse from another, until I met Fg Off ********, WRAF.
Cpl *****, WRAF, is a fitting replacement for the Station Bike.
Flt Lt ******'s insubordination occasionally borders on humour.
I did not know one end of a horse from another, until I met Fg Off ********, WRAF.
Cpl *****, WRAF, is a fitting replacement for the Station Bike.
Flt Lt ******'s insubordination occasionally borders on humour.
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Originally Posted by LunchMonitor
"When this captain calls for the starting checks, he begins a chain of events over which he has no control whatsoever!"
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This man has all the attributes of a dog - except loyalty.
Given an extended course of instruction this officer could possibly learn to ride a bicycle.
If ordered to catch a train this man would probably be found at a bus station looking puzzled.
Given an extended course of instruction this officer could possibly learn to ride a bicycle.
If ordered to catch a train this man would probably be found at a bus station looking puzzled.