Caption competition

[Pandalet]

for the first:

"maybe I can't land on a dime, but I can land on a thousand bucks!"

for the second (scraping the barrel):

"...with all the comforts of home!"

[adr]

But it worked on Thunderbirds!

-or-

"All right, laddie, you can come out from under there now."

adr

[airborne_artist]

No-one explained to Nigel that after his conversion from SH to FJ that he wouldn't be able to take USLs any more.

[ZH875]

For the First:

..But the muppets said they could make it fit..

And the second:

...It could be worse, the other side has an Electric Chair...

[Cool_Hand]

1. A poor attempt at recreating a Darwin award, for starters it was a corvette and that my son is not a JATO.

2. Plumbing on the go...

[snafu]

First: Can we have our 'follow me' truck back?

Second: This is the only time you'll see us sitting down on the job!

[Conan the Librarian]

"Caught here, the emergency response team from Cisterns of Mercy, en route to yet another blockage"

For the F-15 shot, one is ruminating on that one.

Conan

[Onan the Clumsy]

1. In fairness, checking the rearview mirror before reversing had never been stressed in taxiing class.

2. Later Patrick was to regret his career choice of both plumbing AND Electrical Services

[Bruiser Loose]

1. Osama Bin Laden and AQ continued their experiments with the new car bomb.

2. But I'm the only gay in the village!

[Hilife]

1. Just like I said Bud, it ain’t gonna fit on the roof rack.

2. Maybe if I wave, they won’t notice me flushing in the station.

[ZH875]

1. See I told you the lock on the roof box was broken.

2. Who said the tradesmen round here don't give a sh1t.

[Northern Circuit]

The new four wheel drive option was not a resounding success.

[Milt]

"Hey you -- get out of there. The pilot has just waved Chocks Away."

and

"Check the other side -- it's worse."

[antipodean alligator]

Those C-Model Homos will mount anything that moves!

and

You're lucky I'm not reading the paper whilst I'm driving on the throne!

[WhiteOvies]

1) Clocked on the Gatso yesterday, Maverick had his revenge on the first wave of the day.

2) Good thing I'm not driving a dumper truck.

[4Foxtrot]

1. In an attempt to fight AQ at their own game, the USAF failed to get to grips with the car-bombing concept.

2. I actually am naked from the waist down.

[brickhistory]

1. Inevitably, as the F-15's carrying capability increased, the stress on the gear increased. This multi-bogey gear mod, however, still needed some work.

2. Unnnngggghhhh!

[ShyTorque]

1. I hope you're wearing a high vis. vest in there!

2. Now that's what I call a true "utility vehicle".

[SALAD DODGER]

Marshalls first attempt at foaming the wings was going quite well!
(Sorry couldnt resist)

[Tourist]

The true story behind this one is better than any caption!