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Caption competition

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Caption competition

Old 1st Sep 2016, 07:57
  #37601 (permalink)  
I don't own this space under my name. I should have leased it while I still could
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Lincolnshire
Age: 77
Posts: 16,680
Turn it over, I always wipe the poo off on the bottom of the carpet.
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Old 1st Sep 2016, 08:21
  #37602 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Upper Gumtree
Posts: 669
So, this is how we deal with all those illegal migrants:-

First, you tell them there is a red carpet rolled out for them

Then, I will sweep them under it as soon as they arrive

So that the military can tread firmly on them and keep them down.

Kein problem!
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Old 1st Sep 2016, 09:21
  #37603 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Wiltshire
Age: 67
Posts: 442
"I'm sure I hid zer ignition key under zer carpet when ve arrived..."
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Old 1st Sep 2016, 10:46
  #37604 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: North Queensland, Australia
Posts: 2,869
"Well boys, it's true I don't mind munching the odd carpet, but zis one is just not up to scratch I'm afraid."
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Old 1st Sep 2016, 11:08
  #37605 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: Southport
Posts: 1,094
Originally Posted by Arm out the window View Post
"Well boys, it's true I don't mind munching the odd carpet, but zis one is just not up to scratch I'm afraid."
"No, I meant send carpet to München"
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Old 1st Sep 2016, 11:54
  #37606 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: QLD - where drivers are yet to realise that the left lane goes to their destination too.
Posts: 2,258
I swear he said he'd leave the key under the mat!

Edit: apologies to Jim's Bro - don't know how I missed that.

Last edited by Traffic_Is_Er_Was; 1st Sep 2016 at 12:03. Reason: stupidity
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Old 1st Sep 2016, 11:58
  #37607 (permalink)  

Evertonian
 
Join Date: May 2000
Location: #3117# Ppruner of the Year Nominee 2005
Posts: 10,198
"Right size, wrong colour" was Angela Merkel's response upon seeing Donald Trump's inauguration present.
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Old 1st Sep 2016, 12:06
  #37608 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: QLD - where drivers are yet to realise that the left lane goes to their destination too.
Posts: 2,258
Angela Merkel - talking a "walk on the white side"!
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Old 1st Sep 2016, 12:29
  #37609 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Often in Jersey, but mainly in the past.
Age: 75
Posts: 5,605
"Are you sure this is my carpet, and not MPN11's?"
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Old 1st Sep 2016, 13:06
  #37610 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Somewhere flat
Age: 64
Posts: 4,125
A dilemma for the German leader as she is told that her red carpet is pointing towards Poland.
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Old 1st Sep 2016, 13:41
  #37611 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: Southport
Posts: 1,094
Would that make it a Liebensraum carpet?
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Old 1st Sep 2016, 14:42
  #37612 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Hanging off the end of a thread
Posts: 16,994
Ok I will score this one on the weekend.

Wander00 thank you for the update, if in contact pass on my regards to him
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Old 2nd Sep 2016, 12:52
  #37613 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Somewhere flat
Age: 64
Posts: 4,125
Nein, Dumbkopf....I said I wanted to "Axe the Minister".
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Old 2nd Sep 2016, 12:54
  #37614 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Somewhere flat
Age: 64
Posts: 4,125
It is a gift for Herr Corbyn so that he is more comfortable on train journeys. Don't forget to wipe your shoes on it first!
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Old 2nd Sep 2016, 20:21
  #37615 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: France
Age: 76
Posts: 6,381
NL - I think Danny is having an occasional look-see - He responded to a post of "anyone know when...." Hence my post


W
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Old 2nd Sep 2016, 20:57
  #37616 (permalink)  
I don't own this space under my name. I should have leased it while I still could
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Lincolnshire
Age: 77
Posts: 16,680
Originally Posted by NutLoose View Post
I'll hold it down as you step on then we will see if it really flies
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Old 2nd Sep 2016, 22:56
  #37617 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Often in Jersey, but mainly in the past.
Age: 75
Posts: 5,605
OK, this carpet will do for whoever is the next US President. Now where's my new one?
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Old 2nd Sep 2016, 23:16
  #37618 (permalink)  

Evertonian
 
Join Date: May 2000
Location: #3117# Ppruner of the Year Nominee 2005
Posts: 10,198
Whoa, there was a crack under there. Lucky eh?
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Old 3rd Sep 2016, 17:12
  #37619 (permalink)  

Avoid imitations
 
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Wandering the FIR and cyberspace often at highly unsociable times
Posts: 12,647
"It's not a crack, Ma'am.... It's your reflection in a puddle."
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Old 3rd Sep 2016, 18:15
  #37620 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Hanging off the end of a thread
Posts: 16,994
And the winner is MPN11

With

No, I am NOT goose-stepping. Verstein?
2nd is Shytorque with his last entry.

Over to MPN11

And thinking of you and of the service on Monday Danny

Last edited by NutLoose; 3rd Sep 2016 at 19:37.
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