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Caption competition

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Old 17th Dec 2015, 08:33
  #33121 (permalink)  
I don't own this space under my name. I should have leased it while I still could
 
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"I know it's somewhere officer, it's about 5 inches long, dark colour, and I am sure I dropped it here."

"Hmm, well keep looking Sir, you're not warm yet."
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Old 17th Dec 2015, 08:55
  #33122 (permalink)  
 
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Firstly, sir, it's the rear right tyre and, secondly, the reference was about being "east of the Ural River", not a "beast of a river of urine"...
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Old 17th Dec 2015, 08:58
  #33123 (permalink)  

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But I am the pilot! Wait...let me get my watch out of the cargo compartment and I'll prove it...
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Old 17th Dec 2015, 09:06
  #33124 (permalink)  
622
 
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"Yes Officer I will move along....as soon as someone gets this bl**dy helicopter off my foot"
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Old 17th Dec 2015, 10:03
  #33125 (permalink)  
 
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"Yes, Her Majesty was certainly impressed by the FADEC-controlled P&Ws driving the all-comp MRBs; and naturally the QTR, AVCS, HUMS and EGPWS also featured in the decision.

But what really swung it was these rather natty logos and the pair of ermine dice up front.

And the cash-back offer, of course."
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Old 17th Dec 2015, 11:09
  #33126 (permalink)  
 
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Who are you calling a 'smell y pense'
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Old 17th Dec 2015, 11:18
  #33127 (permalink)  

Avoid imitations
 
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Is this your vehicle, Sir?

Well, actually, no it's er....my mother's..

And does your mother know you're out in it?

Well, er....not exactly!

So, a TWOC'er, eh? Just take a seat in the back of the police car, Sir!
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Old 17th Dec 2015, 11:48
  #33128 (permalink)  
 
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It's Latin, actually.

This bit here says "my other helo is an agustawestland"
and that bit says "I am considerably richer than yow."

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Old 17th Dec 2015, 12:18
  #33129 (permalink)  
 
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We have to check the cargo bay every time, Ringo always try to stow away to do the voice over, We've told him, it's the wrong Harold.
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Old 17th Dec 2015, 20:27
  #33130 (permalink)  
Danny42C
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"H.M. says: can you trim the shrubbery back a bit while you're here ?"
 
Old 17th Dec 2015, 20:55
  #33131 (permalink)  
 
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"Is that where you put the bags?"

"No no. They sit behind me."
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Old 17th Dec 2015, 22:07
  #33132 (permalink)  

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Are you the Stripper? Never mind, just get in. We're late for Harry's party...
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Old 17th Dec 2015, 23:10
  #33133 (permalink)  

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When I get this baby up to 88mph then I'm going back...Back to the Tudors!
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Old 17th Dec 2015, 23:18
  #33134 (permalink)  
 
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"Yes sorry about that, but Charles spotted the shrubs and insisted we landed so he could ask their advice."
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Old 17th Dec 2015, 23:35
  #33135 (permalink)  

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Papers? No, there's no papers in here...just a campfire I was preparing...ummm
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Old 18th Dec 2015, 04:41
  #33136 (permalink)  
 
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'That's a unique helicopter paint job Sir' ... 'Yep ... It's a Duchy Original'
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Old 18th Dec 2015, 12:24
  #33137 (permalink)  
 
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I overheard the Boss saying he was going to give me the Boot....and was just checking to what it looked like.
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Old 18th Dec 2015, 18:27
  #33138 (permalink)  
 
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"Sir, wouldn't an airplane be better..?"
"Sure, but you know how much difficult it is to get the old hag off on it?"
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Old 18th Dec 2015, 20:58
  #33139 (permalink)  
 
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OK judging time


In 3rd
Buster Hyman with
When I get this baby up to 88mph then I'm going back...Back to the Tudors!


In 2nd
Coffman Starter with
'That's a unique helicopter paint job Sir' ... 'Yep ... It's a Duchy Original'


And 1st
NutLoose with
"Bonding lead for static electricity? errr no, I haven't got one of those, but if it's static electricity you want I could taser you"


Over to you NutLoose


(And in case your wondering, he is actually making a cup of tea for the policewoman)
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Old 18th Dec 2015, 21:08
  #33140 (permalink)  
Danny42C
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Good man, Nutloose ! (Loctite's the stuff !)
 


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