Caption competition
OK for the best Bacon Sarnie steer 180 for 23, your best hotel is at 235 for 61 and for girls that are going to put out for you.....well lets just say you don't have enough gas to get there
Mum stop crying. I am so sorry as I know getting caught working for the army is going to cause you more shame than even my brother has brought on. (Note he plays the piano at the local whore house).
"I said he could talk the legs off a Donkey.....look at Rupert under that Tin Pot!
Or.....
"At the mere mention of Incoming Fire....Buster did his best imitation of a Turtle!"
Or.....
"At the mere mention of Incoming Fire....Buster did his best imitation of a Turtle!"
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"That's right mum, I find my nightie rucks up under my uniform and bulges out around the collar, what can I do?"
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"Yes it really is true Sir, these chaps walk everywhere and sleep in dirty filthy holes in the ground, how quaint is that?, they don't even have room service"
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"Yes, that's right, one pair of black Oxfords, size 9 please, I left mine outside my foxhole last night to get cleaned and some rotter stole them"
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"Two fat ladies clickety click.... All the eights eighty eight"
"Whaddyamean, how bad is it? I'm grounded and I've got to work with the f-ing pongoes! It can't get any worse."
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"Broadsword calling Danny Boy!"
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"Not in half an hour, you rubber desk johnny. Send the bitch with the wheels now or I'll fly back to Blighty and give your wife something to hang her towels on"
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"Broadsword calling Danny Boy!"
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"Not in half an hour, you rubber desk johnny. Send the bitch with the wheels now or I'll fly back to Blighty and give your wife something to hang her towels on"
Avoid imitations
"Burma calling, Burma calling. We've finally found those damned buried Spitfires!"
Or:
"Hello HQ, Smithers here. The bad news is, we've located Tommy, but his chute didn't open. The good news is, you can cancel the burial team!"
Or:
"Hello HQ, Smithers here. The bad news is, we've located Tommy, but his chute didn't open. The good news is, you can cancel the burial team!"
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"Advance? Good God no, I said Send three and fourpence. We are going to a dance."
Evertonian
"Welcome back to the BBC coverage of the Third test. We are just about ready for the start of Mitchell Johnsons over and..."
***
"Artillery Fire Mission, Grid ES 884, Fire for effect,....good Lord Bertie...those two ants are really going for it!"
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"Danny Boy to Broadsword, authentication please!....Lads, I don't think that's Buster. We may have been compromised if it's Nutty or someone else!"
***
"Artillery Fire Mission, Grid ES 884, Fire for effect,....good Lord Bertie...those two ants are really going for it!"
***
"Danny Boy to Broadsword, authentication please!....Lads, I don't think that's Buster. We may have been compromised if it's Nutty or someone else!"
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"See, I told that bloody Rock Ape chappie I could do his job no problem..... any ideas how my crew are getting on with him doing mine?"
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"At the third stroke, the time will be 08.51 and thirty seconds...pip...pip...pip"
Evertonian
"Roger. Returning to base"
"Problem?"
"Yes. Apparently, I got the wrong end of the stick when they asked me to plough the field"
"Problem?"
"Yes. Apparently, I got the wrong end of the stick when they asked me to plough the field"