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Favourite one liners

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Favourite one liners

Old 4th Aug 2003, 22:52
  #1 (permalink)  
High Flying Bird
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"I can only spell liaison if I put the word 'elicit' in front"

- An unnamed PPRuNer!


"If you don't live it, it won't come out of your horn"

- Charlie Parker
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Old 4th Aug 2003, 23:31
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No matter how cynical you are, it's just never enough.
-Lily Tomlin

Every problem should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.
-A. Einstein

Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans
-Don't remember

Not quite as profound as some of Bino's, I'm afraid...
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Old 4th Aug 2003, 23:38
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"They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist-------------"


Sedgwick, John "Uncle John," General (1813-1864) ."
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Old 4th Aug 2003, 23:44
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I think it was Winston Churchill.

"At sixteen I thought my parents knew nothing. I was surprised at how much they'd learned by the time I was twenty one".

But how true that is.
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Old 5th Aug 2003, 01:07
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Gentleman Aviator
 
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'If you can keep your head whilst those around you are loosing theirs, you clearly don't understand the situation'

Anon
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Old 5th Aug 2003, 01:23
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"this is business...if you want a friend, buy a dog..." -Phil the Sales Manager

"it's easy to be flexible when you're spineless.."- Unknown

"If I wasn't making my own fun, I wouldn't be having any..." - OldAg84



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Old 5th Aug 2003, 01:27
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Free Man, Not a Number
 
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Churchill...

Annoyed at being distrurbed whilst sitting on his private lav, was told that the Lord Privey seal was outside and needed to see him.

"Tell the Lord Privey, that his Lordship is in the Privey and can only deal with one sh*t at a time!"
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Old 5th Aug 2003, 01:30
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One of my favourites- I can't remember the exact wording, the quote's from Reg Ansett. Exact wording aside, basically it means that if you are not going to work longer hours than 9 to 5, you won't achieve anything.

Another one of my favourites (I use it as often as I can) :

"Well stuff the lot of you's then"

SixStarAnsett
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Old 5th Aug 2003, 01:37
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I'm not drunk, I'm just very happy!

Me
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Old 5th Aug 2003, 01:38
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Anthony Carn
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I'm not afraid of dying..

I just don't want to be around when it happens.

(Woody Allen ?)

-------------------------------------------

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the number of moments that take our breath away.

Excellent ! (A prooner.)
 
Old 5th Aug 2003, 02:16
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MMEMatty
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"My soul is in the sky." William Shakespeare, 'A Midsummer Night's Dream,' Act V. Scene I.


"The Bullsh!t stops here" - Sign above the entrance to the "Top Gun" fighter school (i think)

"I would recommend a solo flight to all prospective suicides. It tends to make clear the issue of whether one enjoys being alive or not." T. H. White, 'England Have My Bones,' 1936.

Matty
 
Old 5th Aug 2003, 02:34
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Tim was so learned that he could name a horse in nine languages - so ignorant, that he bought a cow to ride on. (Benjamin Franklin)

Failure is success if we learn from it. (Malcolm S. Forbes)

Whether you think you can or you can't - you're right. (Henry Ford)

Don't let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do. (Anon)
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Old 5th Aug 2003, 02:44
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"No sir!, I was not kissing your wife, I was whispering in her mouth"
Groucho Marx
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Old 5th Aug 2003, 02:50
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Nothing suceeds like a toothless budgerigar - my wife chap at a dinner party
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Old 5th Aug 2003, 02:56
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Ohcirrej
 
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"Screw you guys, I'm going home"
Eric Cartman, South Park.

"God it's hard to be christian when you have to work with a$$holes like this"
Overheard one day, Brisbane ATSC.
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Old 5th Aug 2003, 03:42
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"Courage! And shuffle the cards...." Lola Montez

Born Eliza Gilbert, in Limerick, Ireland, 1818.

Famous (but bad) dancer; mistress to many, including Franz Liszt and Alexandre Dumas; acquaintance of Balzac, Victor Hugo, George Sand, Lamartine; intimate of kings and prime ministers; de facto ruler of Bavaria as King Ludwig I declined; belle of the California gold rush; would-be Queen of Lolaland. Early feminist of sorts and writer of a book of beauty tips. Homicidal temper; carried a whip. One of the most outrageous women of her time.

"Keep your fears to yourself, but share your courage with others"
Robert Louis Stephenson
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Old 5th Aug 2003, 03:48
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"God is dead." Nietzsche
"Nietzsche is dead." God
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Old 5th Aug 2003, 04:53
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Ich bin ein Prooner.
 
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Never grumble about getting old. Many are denied the privilege.
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Old 5th Aug 2003, 05:26
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We are all always in the sh1t,... it's just the depth that varies
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Old 5th Aug 2003, 07:48
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Ich bin ein Prooner.
 
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In a heated moment in the House, Lady Astor said to Churchill "Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink" to which Churchill replied "Madam, If you were my wife, I would drink it."

Attributed both to Churchill's landlady, also to Lady Astor, I don't know which - "Mr Churchill, you are drunk." to which he said "Yes, and you, Madam, are ugly. But I will be sober in the morning!"
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