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The really really boring and totaly pointless snippets of information thread

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The really really boring and totaly pointless snippets of information thread

Old 9th Sep 2003, 22:11
  #1641 (permalink)  

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I reckon SG is really a bloke - probably a grizzled old BA retiree with too much time (among other things) on his hands.

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Old 9th Sep 2003, 22:13
  #1642 (permalink)  

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I found a Black Forest Gataux in the kitchen, fancy a slice Mr Draper?

Ozzy
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Old 9th Sep 2003, 22:50
  #1643 (permalink)  
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Sounds like an offer you can't refuse Mr Draper...I think the Atkins diet will let you eat chocolate too...just bread & carbohydrates they ban.

Oh well....my days gone from bad to worse, good job I didn't pop out for a pint at lunch I'd be legless by now.

C'mon, someone cheer me up. pleeeeaaaaasssssseeeeee
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Old 10th Sep 2003, 04:43
  #1644 (permalink)  
 
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Its been a long time since I added to this thread.
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Old 10th Sep 2003, 04:46
  #1645 (permalink)  
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One has gone off Black Forrest of late, one is into Double Lemon and Rasberry Ripple at the mo.


Watching that new Ab Fab episode, sad to see what was once a very funny prog turn into absolute tripe.
Time they binned it I think.
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Old 10th Sep 2003, 05:30
  #1646 (permalink)  
 
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Drat - I didn't realise that was a new episode. I just assumed it must be one of the many repeats we keep getting nowadays. Now I've missed the opportunity to say it wasn't as good etc.

Never mind - I'll watch the repeat next week, and the week after, and the week after...
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Old 10th Sep 2003, 05:52
  #1647 (permalink)  
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Whats the national obsession with bloody suntans in this bloody country.
There seems to be those vertical tanning booths popping up on every street corner here.
Had God wanted DrapeS to be brown he would have caused him to be born on the west coast of Africa or outer Mongolia or some such place,he would not have caused Drapes to be born a honkey, One has nothing against dark pigmentation on folks who were born like that and that was the colour nature intended, you understand,it evolved to serve a purpose.
Just as the northern Europeam white skin evolved to produce vitimin d,and it stopped us showing up in the snowy backdrop of the ice age, made us harder to spot by Sabre tooths and the like, twas a evolutionary necessity.
Why do white Europeans spend enormous sums of money killing their epidermis with harmfull UV rays just to look burned.
Drapes brother, who is as dark as drapes is fair, flops on the ground and spreadeagles any time the sun shows its face, and as one keeps telling him, his skin looks ten years older than he does.
A hundred years ago a tanned skin was a sign of peasantry, only tillers of the soil or hogg minders and turnip farmers had tanned skin.
A tanned skin in those days was the equivilent of having "love" and "hate" tattooed on ones knuckles nowadays, it would tend to forbid you entry of posh resturants and such.
When Drapes did his wanderings in the tropics he scuttled from shade to shade, rather liike Count Dracula, consiquently drapes still posseses skin like a new born babe.
Anyway one has a cob on , one got rooked out of a item on ebay by a bastard that subbmited a bid 100 milliseconds after drapes who submited a bid 120 milliseconds before the end of said auction.
BASTARD!!!!!!

Last edited by tony draper; 10th Sep 2003 at 06:05.
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Old 10th Sep 2003, 06:17
  #1648 (permalink)  
 
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topcat

Look at it like this, Herr Drapes has to contend with the world's injustices, Maitre D. strives to perfect iambic pentameter, SG's. . . well . . . hopelessly misled that laying on a beach brings happiness and, well, one here is in the throes of stress, trying hard to maintain patience with puter that desperately needs an axe.

All in all, life's pretty normal.
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Old 10th Sep 2003, 13:22
  #1649 (permalink)  

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Cheer up, topcat, I'll be back in a couple of weeks.

Happy Moon Festival to you all. (Pssst, anyone wanna buy a mooncake? Several varieties available, barely touched, special offer, going cheap. Much better for you than Sara Lee, Mr Draper, though I don't think they do them in raspberry ripple flavour yet. )

Have I missed anything?
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Old 10th Sep 2003, 15:41
  #1650 (permalink)  
 
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Robert De Niro,
My absolute hero,
Counted right up to ten and back down to zero.

Helena Bonham Carter,
Even bloody smarter,
Made a lovely bolognaise,
With only one tomato.

Who needs Moon Cakes when you have insomnia. The drug of choice for the 21st Millennium.
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Old 10th Sep 2003, 16:17
  #1651 (permalink)  
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Why the freaking frigging f*** don't I get no goddamn posts from Singaporegirl no
more?", said Herr Draper to his new mexicana, very hot and spicy, chick
Zitlaly (sp?). She didn't answer at first. Perhaps she was scared. Moments
earlier Draper had barked orders at her to fetch him the last bottle of
tequila from the fridge, giving her a firm slap across the back of the head
to hurry her along.

"Answer me girl" he roared, globules of spit flying out of his mouth like
shotgun pellets.

"Me not know Senor Drapeeerr," she replied from her all-foured position as a
human footstool at his feet "Peeerhaps, youa shoulda aska heer."

"Okay I will," said Tony. And a smile started to sneak up his cheeks. "Come
here, Zitlaly baby, eh? You know Mr.Draper doesn't mean it when he hits ya
doncha? doncha? I only hits ya cos I loves ya. You know I loves ya doncha?"

He started nuzzling her slightly hairy ear.

FADE TO BLACK

****************************************************


I knew she'd not be able to resist! Cocktail in one hand - keyboard in the other, she couldn't go a whole 2 weeks without PPRuNe! Poor Girl...she needs a holiday

Not really missing your banter.....much

Last edited by topcat450; 10th Sep 2003 at 16:28.
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Old 10th Sep 2003, 17:01
  #1652 (permalink)  
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Mooncake? whatever is that?, baked in a crater one presumes,sounds foreign.
Welcome back singaporegirl, back for a short burst of work no doubt, before heading off on another holiday.
Not much been going on, the youngsters pushing their weight around,as per usual, one had to put a bit of stick about.

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Old 10th Sep 2003, 18:00
  #1653 (permalink)  
 
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topcat..?

was that "slightly derriere"?

One can never be sure, with the noise of conversation drowning out one's reading. Mind you, it's almost ironic with SG's temporary and fleeting visit.

Or does it mean "a little behind in stuff"?

This reporter takes umbrage at the epithet "youngsters".


SG..? haven't ya been scrolling back? Sheesh, we leave her enough homework for a month and she never bl***y reads it. Well, what can one expect from jetsetters in the Eastern Riviera with money enough to buy smart people?

* * * per ardua ad publicum * * *

( mooncakes - what the groom's drunk buddies do)
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Old 10th Sep 2003, 18:39
  #1654 (permalink)  
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************************************************
Fade In


"Oy, Zit, it worked. She's only gone and bloody posted from her vacation hannhe." shouted Tony across the room in the vague direction of his ensuite facilities.
"Zees ees berry good news, Senor Drapeeer," poor Zitlaly spluttered in reply.
He had chained her to the toilet flush after catching her flirting with the young indigenous boy from the tequila shop.
"One moment,Zit, Who is dees maan who laughes at my boy
TopCat"
Foaming at the mouth Draper presses the MUTE button to silence the shopping channel audible in the room and turns his head towards the bedroom door "VICTOR! punish dees Rossco and hang ees body so the villagers can see"
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Old 10th Sep 2003, 19:01
  #1655 (permalink)  

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El Mariachi Scarface arrives on scene and sneers to all, "say hello to ma leetle friend"

BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM

"Anyone else move an da Black Forest an Mooncake gets it."

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Old 11th Sep 2003, 07:27
  #1656 (permalink)  
 
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I think there's a couple more people here who might be in need of a holiday...
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Old 11th Sep 2003, 08:55
  #1657 (permalink)  
 
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I had a holiday once.. highly over-rated things. 1996 if memory serves.
Got me outta the small, dark basement.

( ponders) If the suffix correctly implies SG's gender one wonders how old she's not. With offhand comments like "small and perfectly-formed" one would suggest a youthful, lithe vigour to match the slightly impertinent and brash underpinnings of her narrative.

On the other side of the foot, these Malaysian types are very inscrutable and they can look half their age.



* * * per ardua ad publicum * * *
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Old 11th Sep 2003, 10:14
  #1658 (permalink)  
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Risky, come on! She is as Malaysian as Olive Oyl!

I am quite persuaded that the dear girl is almost as advertised, possibly exactly as advertised with the defence that you yourself have supplied some of the description and your own self-deception.

I believe she is small and perfectly formed, to which I add witty, well informed, well read, a dish, and well-educated in the tradition of a young English lady of considerable means and de bonne famille.

Well, Daddy has the means. I should bet that Mummy also is a dish with the added poise of eighteen more years and is something to see; as where Daddy is, say, a colonel of Royal Marines in dress uniform, Mummy the colonel’s lady in battledress, and G is daughter. Translate that into commerce or industry (as closely as you can ever translate a colonel of Royal Marines into any lesser being), and you have the host and hostess in Singapore (Ma’am! Sir!).

A lady does not have G’s confidence and sang-froid if she is, forgive the word, a crow. When G says jump, with the sheathed-claw purr I am sure, the boys jump, and she knows they will. She knows because they always do. I would. Human nature. No officer ever gave her a ticket.

Her ability to pick up, understand and use rudimentary braid Scots, her immediate correction of my own slip between the Sloane Square girl and the West End girl, her familiarity with not too common European verse forms ("skaldic" forms), her easy reference to (and perhaps patronage of, although I can’t be sure) fashionable and inevitably pricy ladies’ shoemakers, and her discussion of, and no doubt skills in, the subtler confections of the kitchen, all bespeak one expensively educated, comfortably placed, leisured, and as a subordinate thought quite widely travelled, all in the UK; and as we all know, or believe anyway, even more widely travelled than that.

I put NOOO and NOOUD to her, and she did not deny knowing what they mean. For readers in, say, Australia, these mean .......................... Ach No! I shall not betray the dear girl's secrets further. Not in this regard.

I place her as English upper middle classes, parents doing well abroad, and not of the first generation to know gracious living, or at least the standards for gracious living. She attended a very good English boarding seminary for young ladies, and had a great time there with excellent teachers and a small teacher/pupil ratio, on or near the South coast. I do not suggest upper classes: too bright. Besides, she would not be here with us lot if she were.

Many of those skills and experiences might exist in someone of foreign birth, but not I venture all of them.

You think she is Malaysian? She has never said so. All she does is indicate a link with Singapore. You added the inference, as did I (mistakenly as I came to believe) in one of my early haikus. Thereafter I was on to her wicked deceptions (not explicit deception; more suggestio falsi), and she avoided a lie by replying through the pen of that poor Slavic girl, her skivvy.

I would run off with her at the slightest hint, but I would be cast irredemably as Herr Professor Unrat, and I do not want that. .....too chicken to take the risk. Besides Mrs Davaar would raise picky objections. She would not understand. Actually, she would. If anyone does not know who Professor Unrat was, do not worry. She knows (both of them do). That’s enough. Or she’ll find out. But she knows already.

My own place is infested from time to time by neat chicks, late teens, early twenties, friends of Miss Davaar. “Neat chick!”, I say to myself. Then the neat chick pats me on the head, kisses my cheek, and says: “Hi! Pops!”. Let topcat do the worrying.

Last edited by Davaar; 21st Sep 2003 at 20:05.
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Old 11th Sep 2003, 15:35
  #1659 (permalink)  
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On the othe hand, given todays technology, SG could be a cubic foot of electronics.



We may all be victims of the Turin test.
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Old 11th Sep 2003, 16:11
  #1660 (permalink)  
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Morning Chaps....

Any ideas how long someone can last...working 12 hrs a day 7 days a week? Would it lead to severe knackering or is it no problem? (soft-lads need not answer )
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