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The really really boring and totaly pointless snippets of information thread

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The really really boring and totaly pointless snippets of information thread

Old 1st Sep 2003, 21:20
  #1461 (permalink)  
 
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Location: to the left and down
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Okay, who's nearest SG's digs and wants to check up... ? Might be cause for concern, who knows what a dog-napper is capable of doing once the poor pooch is under the control of such atrocious English?
I mean .. 'havel'..?!?!?? not even on your worst enemy....

* * * Antipodoean calls to certain in Interpol * * *
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Old 1st Sep 2003, 21:23
  #1462 (permalink)  
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Proceed with caution,they go in for strange sports in Singpore, she may have a ridge of horn like calus along the edge of her palms.
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Old 1st Sep 2003, 21:28
  #1463 (permalink)  
I'll mak siccar
 
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Hi secety:

Davr no good. No got farm. I got big farm, 10 section, 6,400 acre, durum, canola, big John Deere, cabin, CD, earphones, air. Combine. Truck for grain. Pickup go town. Dugout for water but no rain. Rain nex yeer. Mabe git fed sub. Too little too late. Same alla time. No got money to spend. Need money for new section nex yeer. Eleven section. Draper got money. You spik heem. Other guy too Risky.

Got house on farm. Two holer easy walk. Near big town. Thirty mile. Prairie. Three elevator, RCMP, Petro-Canada gas, Uke Catholic church. Eat good at gas station and Uke church ladies social.

Sngapogl say she cook good. She make vereneke? She wanna git marry? She no big, but we make four baby she size 12, two axe handle across. Sngapogl strong? Sngapogl drive John Deere good?

I wanna git marry. Talk post-modernism analysis and critique. Sngapogl blonde? Blonde good for me. Gotta be blonde. Sngapogl know her place? Know her place good for me. Momma say Singapogl Uke Catholic, mabe Othodox? Uke Catholic, mabe Othodox, good for Momma. Othodox no so good as Uke Catholic, but Hokay. No Uke Catholic, no mabe Othodox, no so good for Momma. No so good for Bishop.

Sngapoboy no good. He no care Sngapogl no know her place. Wimp.

Sngapogl no blonde? no Uke Catholic? You blonde? You Uke Catholic? Mabe you Othodox? Mabe Sngapogl lose farm. No so good. You big, strong?

Winter we go Brownsville, Tex.; Maui, Haw; or Phoenix, Ariz.

Uke in the Tuque,

Bogdan.
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Old 1st Sep 2003, 21:58
  #1464 (permalink)  
Alba Gu Brath
 
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Hey Davaar, you have John Deere. Me like John Deere. Maybe you have work for poor little farmer boy?????
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Old 1st Sep 2003, 22:42
  #1465 (permalink)  

stiletto psychopath mk4
 
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Unbelievable! The wretched girl not only steals my username and password, she also has the gall to demand money with menaces from gullible Prooners. Please don’t believe her – she’s an inveterate liar. (It wasn’t Maldini, it was Inzaghi.)

Surely, Mr Davaar, there is some law against this? I hope that you would not be soft-hearted enough to get her out of prison or appeal against her expulsion. (You should check the security of your system too – some oik Uke farmhand seems to have hacked in and is making very forward suggestions. Tell him I don’t think Jimmy Choo makes tractor-driving shoes. And although I have catholic tastes, I’m certainly not orthodox. Mind you, sounds as if he and my ex-secretary would make an excellent pair, though she can’t cook to save her life – it’s all cabbage this and cabbage that. Her pierogi are definitely inferior to my jiaozi.)

Mr Rossco and Mr Draper, thank you for your concern.
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Old 1st Sep 2003, 22:57
  #1466 (permalink)  
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You can take the girl from singapore but you can't take singapore from the girl.

PS, Is Raffles still open? on had a [email protected] there once, one was in Dry Dock, or should one say ones vessel was, oneself wasn't, hense the [email protected]
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Old 1st Sep 2003, 22:59
  #1467 (permalink)  
 
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Ginger caught the odour across the room and his apprehension increased. Crikey - could it be gangrene? "I say, sir, if you're ill, you really ought to see the MO. I mean to say, we need you. England needs you!" Biggles smiled smugly to himself. Trust old Ginger to get straight to the point.

"Well, old chap, to be honest, I haven't been getting my fair share of the thunder-box of late. You know how it is - hours sitting in the cockpit, then a quick refuelling and back to fighting the Hun. Never seem to get the chance..." Ginger felt a surge of compassion for this leader of men, this tireless warrior, who was prepared to endure any discomfort in his defence of King and Country.

"If you like, sir, I could cut along to the dispensary and get you some number nines."

"I'm afraid it's gone beyond that stage, old chap. I've been swallowing bucketfuls of the wretched things and all they have given me is this damn blasted wind. Incredibly bad show, especially in the cockpit. Needs drastic action y’know - only the good old botty pipe is going to sort it now."
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Old 1st Sep 2003, 23:09
  #1468 (permalink)  
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Oh dear, the corner shop one frequents has just had a sort of chest freezes display cabinet instaled, it is stuffed to the gunnels with Sara Lee Gateux of various calibers, tiz a mans work we have before us Draper..

Hmmm double lemon today one thinks.
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Old 1st Sep 2003, 23:33
  #1469 (permalink)  

stiletto psychopath mk4
 
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Raffles is indeed still there, Mr Draper, though seems to have more shops than accommodation these days. I believe Kipling recommended eating there but not sleeping. I might pop in myself next week for afternoon tea.

Is Mr Spork trying to tell us something about the state of his digestive system?
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Old 1st Sep 2003, 23:47
  #1470 (permalink)  
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Twas a sort of tradition then, first timers to Singapore had to have a tipple at Raffles, before indulging in, err other cultural activities.
We were bound for Haiphong when we departed Singapore, and there was not a lot of cultural activity to be had there.
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Old 1st Sep 2003, 23:56
  #1471 (permalink)  
 
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In the early 17th century the earliest form of the Union Jack was known as 'the British flag' or 'the flag of Britain'. Towards the end of that same century the flag was referred to as 'the Jack', or 'Jack flag', or 'the King's Jack', and in 1674, while formally referred to as 'His Majesty's Jack', it was commonly called the Union Jack.
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Old 2nd Sep 2003, 00:04
  #1472 (permalink)  
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I always thunk it was called the Union Jack because it was the Union Flag and hung on the Jack staff of British Vessels.
Incidently the American version of the Union flag which they like to forget they flew once, was called the Grand Union Flag, that turncoat scallywag John Paul Jones, refused to fly anything but the grand Union Flag on his ship, which seems a bit strange.
Mebbee insurance in case he was caught, not that it would have done him much good, he wudda danced the hemp hornpipe at execution dock had we layed hands on the bounder.

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Old 2nd Sep 2003, 00:12
  #1473 (permalink)  
 
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Head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes...

Two crematorium workers accused of eating human body parts, washed down with a bottle of wine, have been freed by a Cambodian provincial court because the country has no law against cannibalism. The two men were arrested last week for eating the fingers and toes of a body they were cremating.
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Old 2nd Sep 2003, 00:13
  #1474 (permalink)  

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Mmmmm...barbecues.
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Old 2nd Sep 2003, 00:19
  #1475 (permalink)  
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Actually very little could be done about body snatching here when Burke and Hare were operating, apparently it was not against the law,a corpse had no human rights,the ressurection men could only be charged with trespass, damage to property ect.
The law was changed eventually.
I think the same held true in the USA which was worse than the UK when it came to having your loved ones dug up and cut up just after you had planted then at great expence.
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Old 2nd Sep 2003, 00:21
  #1476 (permalink)  
 
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The logo for the London Underground was the design of electrical draughtsman, Harry Beck, who created the imaginative simple design in 1933.
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Old 2nd Sep 2003, 01:16
  #1477 (permalink)  
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Well, reduced the load of that display cabinet by one Sara Lee Rasberry Ripple Gateau.
One shall not be posting for the next half hour.
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Old 2nd Sep 2003, 02:05
  #1478 (permalink)  
 
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German scientists are studying the world's smallest organism - a bacteria with the unusual nickname "Ancient Dwarf Who Rides the Fire-ball". About one 400-millionth of a millimetre in size, the microbe, also known as Nanoarchaeum Equitans, was discovered in a sample taken by a submarine near the Kolbeinsey riff, a volcanic region in the Atlantic, just north of Iceland.
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Old 2nd Sep 2003, 02:30
  #1479 (permalink)  
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400 milionth of a millimeter, seems a bit wee even for a bacteria, sure it int a virus?
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Old 2nd Sep 2003, 02:37
  #1480 (permalink)  
 
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Nanoarchaeum Equitans would be hugely insulted by that! There are limits surely as to how far one can go with the microbial insults?

Incidentally, was that Raspberry Ripple Gateau a bit heavy going then? You should try Sara Lee Strawberry & Cream Meringue Pie (360gm) mmmmmmm… Just enough for one serving in that!

Criminy! When on Earth is that page 100 going to come up?
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