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The really really boring and totaly pointless snippets of information thread

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The really really boring and totaly pointless snippets of information thread

Old 17th Nov 2003, 20:11
  #3381 (permalink)  

Yes, Him
 
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Saw a truck the other day with something like "Fred Bloggs Trucks Ltd, " painted on it.

None of yer "Logistics Solutions" or "Distribution System" bollix.

Way to go Fred.
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 20:19
  #3382 (permalink)  

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"excuse us, me canny gadgie, but gan yee tell us the wa tuh the nearest jimmy choo shoe emporium?"

Acknowledgements
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 20:45
  #3383 (permalink)  

stiletto psychopath mk4
 
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What's a gadgie? Is it like a budgie? My aunt (the one who had the tortoise) also had a budgie. I was astonished when I went to Oz to see them flying around in the wild.
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 20:53
  #3384 (permalink)  

to sail beyond the sunset
 
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Saw a truck the other day with something like "Fred Bloggs Trucks Ltd, " painted on it.
Indeed. Used to work for a company in the 80's that dealt with
"The Peter Smith Cast Iron Gate Valve Company"

And they are still around!

Way to go Pete.

www.petersmithvalve.co.uk

None of the nancyboy "PS Solutions" rubbish

I imagine ol' Peter as being in tails and a stovepipe hat, like Mr Brunel.
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 20:59
  #3385 (permalink)  

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A gadgie is noble creature renowned for sartorial elegance - normally an Adidas tracksuit. Usually found at the back of a double decker bus, spitting, smoking and supping from a bottle of blue fizzy pop or broon ale. Hobbies include kicking a ball against an abandoned shop, whippet racing and pigeon fancying. Quite helpful when asked for directions and can point out several bookies and “the social” even when inebriated. More sophisticated requests are responded to positively but with a hint of sarcasm and one should not be discouraged by the extensive use of profanities.
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 21:17
  #3386 (permalink)  

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got myself a brand new Dolby DTS receiver for my surround sound system, feckin great sound from DVDs in 5.1 encoding.

Ozzy
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 21:34
  #3387 (permalink)  

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A favourite reported from white van signwriting:

'A Singh & Sons, Carpenters. You've had the Cowboys, now try the Indians'.

Pure class
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 21:44
  #3388 (permalink)  
 
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The A666 runs through Blackburn via Darwen to Bolton.
Draw any conclusions form its numeric signature that you will.
As for Wars of the Roses, Richard III was innocent.
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 21:58
  #3389 (permalink)  
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Australians have a inhereted reluctance to keep things like budgies in cages.
One had a pal who made a fortune painting out the long numbers on the bottom of their ancestral portraits.
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 22:25
  #3390 (permalink)  

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Good to hear that solid productive jobs are enjoying a renaissance in Blightie’s public services.

“Five a day co-ordinators” – to promote the consumption of five portions of fruit a day.

“Walking Officers” to promote walking.

“Nappy Officers” – to encourage the use of real nappies and not Pampers.

Handsome salaries and generous index linked pensions to attract the best.

Industry in the meantime is cajoled by Government to “do better” and become “world class”

Geron yer buggas – get graftin – we need the tax.
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 22:37
  #3391 (permalink)  
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Just fancied some kippers for me tea but alas theres not to be had around here, one could alway pop up Craster one supposes.
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 22:46
  #3392 (permalink)  

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Are you trying to distract us with a red herring, Mr Draper?
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 22:54
  #3393 (permalink)  

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Craster kippers banned by EU

Outraged locals have marched on Alnwick Town Hall to protest at new Eurocratic regulations that ban smoke cured fish products.

Herr Hans Rudi Geberstrothe, EU spokesman stated, “ Ve cannot accept die filthi smoken fishen – ist nicht ser gut for dei healthen”

Several protesters were arrested and have been sent to Guantanamo Bay Naval Station for debriefing and correctional education.

Meanwhile Council officials have agreed to compensate local fishing boat owners with £178,000 per vessel and create new employment for redundent fishermen as "Walking Officiers"
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 23:01
  #3394 (permalink)  
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Alas the North Sea Herring is about as common as the triple horned white Rhino now singaporegirl, the herring was a noble fish even to eat unkippered, far far tastier than that bland creature the Rainbow Trout for instance,Trout alwas reminds me of a herring only completly devoid of any taste whatsoever, likewise the Salmon, neer understood people raving about Salmon, nice looking fish but again tastelss,unless smothered with some foreign Johnny French type sauce, gimmee a slice of Cod or Haddock any day.
Or a kipper of course.
Jetblast seems to be inordinatly obsessed with food these last few days.

By and large one likes the Dutch, one spend much time in Holland, but one of the most revolting sights to witness in a pub was to see a large cigar smoking Dutchman take a raw pickled herring by the tail, tilt back his noggin slide the offensive creature down his throat and pull out the backbone with ribs and such still attached,
yuk put Drapes of his beer for thiirty seconds it did
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 23:21
  #3395 (permalink)  
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I too like the Dutch.

Whilst trawling the seedier side of Holland, I too was disgusted to the point of not drinking for at least a minute by a sight I saw.

'Twas almost the reverse of your experience though Mr Draper, I saw a woman on her knees in a bar, she slid a bone down her throat!...repeatedly I might add! 'Twas a meaty bone too -




It's posts like this where every insinct says no..don't put it...it's an obvious gag...let someone else make it... keep ya mouth schtum ...but I cannot usually resist.
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 23:21
  #3396 (permalink)  

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At least the herring was dead, Mr Draper. The Chinese, as you may know, like their food as fresh as possible. In China the street fish sellers have wooden boards with a nail at one end. Onto this nail they skewer the head of a live eel and then, while it is still wriggling, fillet it by running their cleaver down one side of the backbone and then the other. Crude but devastatingly effective, like so much that is Chinese.
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 23:29
  #3397 (permalink)  
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One once caught a catfish of vast proportion whilst fishing in the river Plate, cookie took it away and cooked it for use as a treat, it tasted bloody revolting it did, so one is not taken in by all this talk of freshness
One has also developed a taste for fish fingers recently.

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Old 17th Nov 2003, 23:39
  #3398 (permalink)  

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Craster Kippers, now yer talking. What with all the foody threads on here of late I can see a gourmet safari is on the cards.

Maybe this weekend I'll head back North and stock up with real kippers, pork pies, sausages and black pudden.

They still accept beads & mirrors in Craster Mr D?
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Old 17th Nov 2003, 23:56
  #3399 (permalink)  
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Prolly Mr G, but please remember Europe is about as popular a syphilis in the Northumbrian Fishing Community, do not under any circumstances offer anyone in Craster Euros, or you will prolly find yourself sans innards, dangling head first over a pile of smoking oak chips.

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Old 18th Nov 2003, 00:00
  #3400 (permalink)  

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If they do that to Gainsey they had better make sure they hang him on stainless steel hooks - the Europrats get very stressed if the old wooden pegs are used.....
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