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Do people not know how to behave in public?

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Do people not know how to behave in public?

Old 7th May 2022, 21:29
  #21 (permalink)  
 
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Originally Posted by stevef View Post
I was on the bus yesterday and two men in their late '40's/early '50s were having a very loud conversation, which included swearing and sexual comments about women they worked with. On the same route it's not uncommon for senior citizens (I'm one too, but don't usually act it) to take up two places by putting their shopping on the window seat instead of the floor or rack. Then they're oblivious to - or pointedly ignore - passengers having to stand because of their selfishness.
OK, some youngsters can make a nuisance of themselves (usually group bravado) but so can people plenty of adults. Don't we all just love a drunk on public transport ...
Ok not the bus (if I have to take a bus I would stay home) but take the train regularly. Have this all the time. I always make a point of sitting in the seat that someone has placed belongings even if there are other seats free. Say excuse me and give them 10 seconds or so then grab there belongings and plop them on their lap and sit down.

I also always interrupt anyone playing music or talking on their phone loudly. Music I ask them to turn it down or use headphones. Talking loudly on the phone I ask them to either take it to the vestibule or tone it down. 8/10 it does the job. The other 2 they may start getting aggressive but would rather that than listen to their call or music.
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Old 7th May 2022, 21:55
  #22 (permalink)  
 
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Has anyone tried a youth repellent app, supposedly similar sound to electronic mosquito devices. For those that don't know it simply produces a high pitched sound that only the younger generation can hear, an annoying sound which supposedly makes them want to get away from the source.
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Old 7th May 2022, 21:56
  #23 (permalink)  
 
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Originally Posted by Flyhighfirst View Post
I always make a point of sitting in the seat that someone has placed belongings even if there are other seats free.
Why on earth would you do that?
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Old 7th May 2022, 22:26
  #24 (permalink)  
 
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Originally Posted by N707ZS View Post
Has anyone tried a youth repellent app, supposedly similar sound to electronic mosquito devices. For those that don't know it simply produces a high pitched sound that only the younger generation can hear, an annoying sound which supposedly makes them want to get away from the source.
They were used outside some Tokyo convenience stores years ago as a narrow body FO I could still hear it. Another thing Japanese would like to see from my fellow American visitors is if they could stop talking loudly on trains as it is considered rude. I would be happy if they could just stop their inane loud conversations for the 20 seconds it takes to ride an elevator nobody want s to hear it.
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Old 7th May 2022, 22:41
  #25 (permalink)  

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If the music isn’t to one’s taste during one’s journey, surely one can just instruct the chauffeur to turn it down?
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Old 7th May 2022, 23:16
  #26 (permalink)  
 
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On public transport you are concentrated in a confined space with people from the whole social spectrum, those above and below you. Most of us here would regard ourselves as middle class, there wouldn't be too many chavs or nobility reading Jetblast. Therefore there would be fewer upper class and more lower class relative to ourselves when taking mass transport, that's why it's often an interesting experience.

A first class rail ticket would yield better travelling company than a late night bus ticket. Generally you can expect a higher standard of behavior from accountants and bank managers in their 50s going to meetings than you'll get from lower income types in their teens and 20s at chucking out time. Nobody remembers two businesses men in suits reading the paper where as you can't fail to remember a couple of slappers fighting because one caught the other with her boyfriend.

There are ways of having a more pleasant journey instead of feeling like part of the audience on the Jeremy Kyle show, unfortunately most cost money. Buying tickets in a higher travel class when available is a good start, as is avoiding peak times and school holidays. A taxi home would be preferable to a night bus, and avoiding bus services which pass through your area en route to a dodgy part of town if possible.

Unfortunately though, you'll sometimes be stuck next to a chav with his feet on the seats.
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Old 8th May 2022, 02:49
  #27 (permalink)  
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More than once, I’ve been at a restaurant and watched a young guy on a date with a young lady, and he’s chatting away on his cell phone with someone else, no doubt feeling like he’s important and making a good impression because he has to take this call, and she’s staring off into the distance, probably wondering why she wasted her time with this self-absorbed idiot.

Come on, if you are on a date at a nice restaurant, at least pretend that you are interested in what the person sitting across from you has to say.
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Old 8th May 2022, 04:26
  #28 (permalink)  
 
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I was in a department store the other day here in northern Australia, and I reckon I noticed about 3 groups of kids just shoplifting with not a care in the world.

I was standing in line for the self serve checkouts, a group of what would appear 15 year olds grabbed coke and other soft drinks from the fridges and opened, consumed as they went around the place. In the corner of my eye I then noticed other kids shoving lollies down jackets.

In a Westfield shopping mall in Sydney only recently, a group of kids riding a electronic scooter throughout the mall at considerable speed while being chased by mall security, who they know have little power, so continue to play games.

I said to a young girl once who I was standing next to, while she put a hundred bucks worth of cosmetics in her pocket, ‘come on you can’t do that’, she then just stared at me for about 30 seconds like I was speaking some foreign language. She then told me to mind my own business ‘you Fn Ct‘. Probably wasn’t even 15.
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Old 8th May 2022, 05:46
  #29 (permalink)  
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There was an IGA store owner on the news here in Perth yesterday. He was saying how a family routinely walks into his shop and helps themselves to $200 to $300 worth of groceries and then just walk out. The shop owner said he is basically powerless to stop them.
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Old 8th May 2022, 06:44
  #30 (permalink)  
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Aviation related:
Ok it's just a prat but still, where are his parents!? Filming the thing?
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Old 8th May 2022, 07:22
  #31 (permalink)  
 
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Originally Posted by Sallyann1234 View Post
I'll give that one a pass. We're not all on Facebook.
Anyone can access this video, whether they are a FB member or not.
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Old 8th May 2022, 07:54
  #32 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by krismiler View Post
On public transport you are concentrated in a confined space with people from the whole social spectrum, those above and below you. Most of us here would regard ourselves as middle class, there wouldn't be too many chavs or nobility reading Jetblast. Therefore there would be fewer upper class and more lower class relative to ourselves when taking mass transport, that's why it's often an interesting experience.

A first class rail ticket would yield better travelling company than a late night bus ticket. Generally you can expect a higher standard of behavior from accountants and bank managers in their 50s going to meetings than you'll get from lower income types in their teens and 20s at chucking out time. Nobody remembers two businesses men in suits reading the paper where as you can't fail to remember a couple of slappers fighting because one caught the other with her boyfriend.

There are ways of having a more pleasant journey instead of feeling like part of the audience on the Jeremy Kyle show, unfortunately most cost money. Buying tickets in a higher travel class when available is a good start, as is avoiding peak times and school holidays. A taxi home would be preferable to a night bus, and avoiding bus services which pass through your area en route to a dodgy part of town if possible.

Unfortunately though, you'll sometimes be stuck next to a chav with his feet on the seats.
Love it ! a seamless JB transition from generalisation to social stratification !....it can only be a matter of time before JB gets its own entry in Debrett's

Actually, appearances can be deceptive. Just because somebody has a grandiose job title, doesn't, for one minute mean they are pillars of society. Friend of friend, interesting lady in fact, used to say the worst anti social behaviour she encountered as up market security was with the clientele at up market events...Henley got mentioned quite a few times in fact.

The other side of train travel is summated by the driver on here...great post, thanks for that.

Motorway Services got mentioned...yep, certainly at BH but, the really "interesting " encounters can be found at 00.silly hrs, Sat and certainly Sun mornings.

Which leads to this little gem...

" Ok not the bus (if I have to take a bus I would stay home) but take the train regularly. Have this all the time. I always make a point of sitting in the seat that someone has placed belongings even if there are other seats free. Say excuse me and give them 10 seconds or so then grab there belongings and plop them on their lap and sit down."

Wow ! now if this is to be believed, that really is a classical example of pompous arrogance and snobbery.

Any particular reason you won't lower yourself to travelling on a bus, which reminds me, my bus pass is due for renewal, so ta for that.

And so to the train...true, people who decide the seat next to them has just become an extension of their office are basically just selfish gits, and frankly, unless there are no other seats available, or, better still, they are sitting in a seat you've got a reservation for, in which case, "s'cuse me sunshine, but.. " and stick the reservation ticket under their nose, why do as you state ?...does this appease some Freudian deep rooted sense of entitlement then ?...

Of course, what you didn't mention, was, the demographic involved...say for example a young male, who make take exception to your actions...or a contemporary lady for that matter...and are you seriously boasting about your actions if the pax was, say, an elderly person or somebody with impairments / learning disabilities who may well need the extra space, if available, for personal items
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Old 8th May 2022, 10:24
  #33 (permalink)  
 
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I'm not sure social class or money or whatever has anything to do with it, it's simply that the proportion of people across the spectrum who are ignorant and selfish has increased year on year. You see it in every public interaction (aask anyone who works in retail or hospitality), how people drive and even how they walk around town. Would probably require some sort of social science dissertation to find the many causes, but lowest common denominator politics and people going on about the end of society, etc all haven't helped. Thing is we're generations deep into this so children now have neither parents nor grandparent who give a monkeys about others, so they'll never know how to behave.
When our kids were younger we regularly got comments off people about how well behaved they were in places, which to me is sad because that's the minimum that should be expected, and the fact that people felt moved to comment on it to me shows we must be in the minority now.....

Last edited by andytug; 8th May 2022 at 10:25. Reason: missed a word out
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Old 8th May 2022, 11:52
  #34 (permalink)  
 
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Originally Posted by andytug View Post
I'm not sure social class or money or whatever has anything to do with it, it's simply that the proportion of people across the spectrum who are ignorant and selfish has increased year on year. You see it in every public interaction (aask anyone who works in retail or hospitality), how people drive and even how they walk around town. Would probably require some sort of social science dissertation to find the many causes, but lowest common denominator politics and people going on about the end of society, etc all haven't helped. Thing is we're generations deep into this so children now have neither parents nor grandparent who give a monkeys about others, so they'll never know how to behave.
When our kids were younger we regularly got comments off people about how well behaved they were in places, which to me is sad because that's the minimum that should be expected, and the fact that people felt moved to comment on it to me shows we must be in the minority now.....
I think you’re right.

We’ve swung from the extreme “children should be seen and not heard” to the “my child has the right to be/say/behave anyway s/he wants” and despite some on here wanting to put a social class label on it, there’s just as much obnoxious behaviour from Sebastian and Tabitha as there is from Jaxxon and Chardonnay. There’s a general sense of entitlement encouraged by parents and contemporaneous thinking. There’s a current philosophy being indoctrinated into youngsters that you can be anything/do anything and the only thing holding you back are ‘labels’
Ironic really when many want a ’ label’ or excuse to justify their non achievement or out of control behaviour. I’ve seen the use of ADD and anger management issues so overused it’s devalued the really genuine cases.

Being polite, personable and showing empathy will open a lot more doors and get you further in life than this subtle aggression and prerogative demanding which seems to be all over the media at the moment.
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Old 8th May 2022, 11:54
  #35 (permalink)  
 
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Andy t Agreed. When you notice something, then it is far too late. It has already happened and is then difficult to change. On the Flight Deck, we are generally very fortunate and do not have many issues. When they do happen, it is not pretty to watch. Modern companies have clear policy, procedures and penalties to encourage correct behaviours in and out of the workplace. Noticeably, the Police and politicians are suffering in public as they catch up with public expectations of decency. Both their issues are ones of gene pool and motivation.
The plain and nasty stories are always there. The old couple on the Crawley train in sunday best clothes just asked for the teenagers to turn down the music in the carriage. As the Crawleys finest left the carriage, one young girl threw her drink all over the ladies suit. Just terrible. I don't have any answers, I am just careful to know when to turn around and run away screaming.

Last edited by Right20deg; 8th May 2022 at 11:56. Reason: Spelling
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Old 8th May 2022, 14:10
  #36 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Sam Ting Wong View Post
.Also be maybe aware that should "people" around you behave better than average or compared to your past experiences it might be less noticable and hence excluded from the equation.
We were on a bus 5 days ago and there was a young mother with a friend and toddler. She was talking to her friend but still managed to go through a book of animals and a book of colours with her child. It was very noticeable to my wife and me as we do not see it often.
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Old 8th May 2022, 19:45
  #37 (permalink)  
 
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Under exposed, I fully respect your observations and I cannot know the developments and social shifts in your area. My personal and completely anecdotal observations are different. I am stunned by how much more sophisticated the young people I meet are compared to my own memories of my youth. But my argument is more of a general nature. I am wondering if your observations can be generalised in regard to an entire generation.

A few points I would like to offer, also as opposite arguments to the comments of Andy Tug above.

- Crime has actually steadily decreased over the last decades

- Social spending as percentage of GDP has dramatically increased

- Charity contributions per capita has increased over time

Additionally I would like to emphasise the current social youth movements. You might have your own opinion about "Fridays for Future" or "The last generation" etc, but no one could deny these organisations are clearly expressions of concern for the greater good of the entire planet. How will future generations judge us Boomers one day? Will they compliment us on our exemplary behaviour in public or will they curse us for sitting idle despite of clear data showing the earth is turning into a green house?

I also would like to point out that manners alone are not a valid signal of an advanced and ethical society. Over centuries the upper class has lived in a bubble of cultivated social exchanges, but at the same time excluded the vast majority of lower classes, especially certain ethnic groups. As an example, how commendable is a group of perfectly behaved gentlemen in tuxedos in an officers club in Johannesburg in 1970? In that sense, and I admit this is an exaggeration, maybe today we exclude certain levels of society by an unfair and unworkable system. My ( sort of) well behaved children are in expensive private schools giving them an unfair advantage. We also know that academic parents are in decline and members of the working class have proportionally more children per mother. What about the social support for these individuals? What kind of working environment, housing conditions, commute, financial pressure etc do these parents have in comparison to our generation? It is easy to judge simply by observation, but what are the possible triggers in our society?

Last edited by Sam Ting Wong; 8th May 2022 at 19:57.
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Old 8th May 2022, 21:44
  #38 (permalink)  

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Crime has actually steadily decreased over the last decades
Statistically that is correct and based on recorded crimes.

My personal experience that unless something is locked, bolted down or protected in some other way then it will get stolen. Most of us who have had things stolen know that it is generally a complete waste of time reporting it unless needing to do so for an insurance claim.
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Old 8th May 2022, 22:14
  #39 (permalink)  
 
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Originally Posted by visibility3miles View Post
Come on, if you are on a date at a nice restaurant, at least pretend that you are interested in what the person sitting across from you has to say.
Remember the old pilot joke: "Okay, that's enough of me talking about me; how about we have a bit of you talking about me?"
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Old 9th May 2022, 06:54
  #40 (permalink)  
 
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Originally Posted by M.Mouse View Post
Statistically that is correct and based on recorded crimes.

My personal experience that unless something is locked, bolted down or protected in some other way then it will get stolen. Most of us who have had things stolen know that it is generally a complete waste of time reporting it unless needing to do so for an insurance claim.
As a counter argument I would point out that crime has declined across the board, including crime that obviously always gets reported (murder rates etc).
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