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How I defeated Social Distancing and Paranoia

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How I defeated Social Distancing and Paranoia

Old 26th Apr 2020, 01:07
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How I defeated Social Distancing and Paranoia

Heh. This afternoon, after being exposed to just a bit too much madness on TV, I got out a big piece of cardboard from my garage. I wrote on both sides "Social Distancing Block Party" and I went down to a friend's market and got a metric crap ton of ice. And 11 cases of beer, various flavors. I took all of the coolers in my house and in my garage, and I filled them with beer and ice. I got out my "grandad minivan" and opened the back lift gate, which is more than 6' from the driver's seat.

And I drove around the neighborhood with all windows open, and ZZ Top on full blast. I brought a broom stick with me. This was to ensure that nobody got too close to me.

I never exceeded 15 miles per hour. As people approached me, I reached out with the broom stick and said:
"No closer, please visit the tail gate."
My neighbors, being sort of sensible, had run me out of beer in about an hour.
.

I hope that at the next homeowners' association meeting, they don't give me a load of crap about my fence.
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 01:45
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Is Johnny Walker the official sponsor of your post?
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 02:07
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Originally Posted by Lonewolf_50 View Post
I went down to a friend's market and got a metric crap ton of ice. .
Why are you using globalist EU China backed units of measurement and not freedom loving US imperial units commie?
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 02:07
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Originally Posted by West Coast View Post
Is Johnny Walker the official sponsor of your post?
No sir, I failed to call up Spoetzel Brewery from Shiner, Texas for an attempt at sponsorship.
And I didn't have the time ... a how how how how.

This was just me doing my civic duty, as I saw it.

I find that Little Ol' Band from Texas to be inspirational at times like these.
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 02:09
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Originally Posted by dr dre View Post
Why are you using globalist EU China backed units of measurement and not freedom loving US imperial units commie?
Because, unlike you, I'm not a .
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 02:13
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Is this supposed to be funny? Don't give up the day job fella.
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 02:58
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oooooh even Billy knows if you start off a tad slow in the intro ya gotta kinda run with it......

Legend!!!!!
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 03:01
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Originally Posted by wtsmg View Post
Is this supposed to be funny? Don't give up the day job fella.
When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. ~Hunter S Thompson

But I don't expect you go get that.
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 03:13
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Lonewolf, that was a very Texan thing to do (and I do mean that in positive way...)
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 03:46
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I like it. If you're gonna do something, ya gotta do it properly.
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 03:48
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Very community minded.

No laws broken.

Good luck with that fence....

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Old 26th Apr 2020, 04:06
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Originally Posted by currawong View Post

Good luck with that fence....
On the bright side, there are three new members on the HOA board.
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 04:15
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I also used to post while drinking thinking it was hilarious. There's always the moment later when you wake up with dim recollections and a sense of foreboding. Then the realisation that how funny I thought I was at the time doesn't stand up to sober scrutiny. But it was fun at the time.
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 04:23
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Originally Posted by tdracer View Post
Lonewolf, that was a very Texan thing to do (and I do mean that in positive way...)
We are not in a densely populated area. Less than 100 total cases to date based on the info I have from someone up at city hall. (Regional population roughly 400,000 ish, but since only about 1500 people have been tested, who knows?).
One death known and two still in ICU.
But because this isn't a place like Houston or Dallas or SFO for that matter, it's hard for the public health officials to sort out how hard they want to tighten the lid.
As an example, yesterday, I was at a food store and the parking lot was 3/4 full. Last week, it was never that full.
Anyway, the churches and schools are still mostly empty. Bars closed. Most restaurants only do take out. Barber shops closed.

Last edited by Lonewolf_50; 26th Apr 2020 at 04:58.
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 05:56
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This proves that Texans will run at 15 mph to grab a free beer from a passing vehicle.
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 13:48
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There's a lot of inbetween in America. Got stuck in Orlando once and decided I would use the weekend to have a look around. Armed with the Avis map from the hire car and a deficit of common sense I decided to have a look at the everglades. After 2 hours driving I consulted the map and finally worked out the scale. Well I was young. Still Sarasota made for a good day out. Had it been Texas I would have been driving yet.
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 14:31
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Glad you all got to blow off some steam Lonewolf, especially to some good music. Nicely done.
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 15:57
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Originally Posted by Lonewolf_50 View Post
....
I took all of the coolers in my house and in my garage, and I filled them with beer and ice. I got out my "grandad minivan" and opened the back lift gate, which is more than 6' from the driver's seat.

And I drove around the neighborhood with all windows open, and ZZ Top on full blast.
.......
Sounds really cool, bravo !!
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Old 26th Apr 2020, 21:22
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Originally Posted by Paultheparaglider View Post
I've heard that Texas is full of Beer Drinkers and Hell Raisers who just love their TV Dinners.
True.
Originally Posted by Paultheparaglider View Post
PS Real beer doesn't need ice.
I think that depends on locale and circumcstance. I've been to England and Scotland, and the weather there compliments nicely the Real Ale drawn properly at a pub. When I was in the Ginza in Tokyo at the Sapporo beer hall, the draft drawn there was not as cold as over here but it suited perfectly the clime and situation. And damn, it was sooo good.
But if you live where it's got 70 percent humidity a lot combined with temps over 90 a lot (Degrees F, convert to C as needed) the interaction between the pint and the environment changes.
If I'm in a bar and the AC is on, a pint of Guinness that's not been chilled suits me fine.
If I am out and about, or just finished cutting the grass, a Lone Star or a LaBatt's Blue that's been sitting in ice for an hour or so hits the spot.
You might say that 'context matters' .. and thanks for a fun post. A how how how how.

Mr Optimistic Laughed, I did.

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Old 27th Apr 2020, 04:18
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Real beer doesn't need ice.
It was once explained to me that beer in the UK can be served at room temperature because room temperature in the UK is

"cold as an iceberg, all gloomy and glum,
cold as the hairs on a polar bear's bum"

We need the ice over here as it's 37C and 90+% humidity. Apparently these conditions are not conducive to Covid19, as we have only had 28 local cases, all contracted elsewhere with 23 now recovered, no community transmission and, with the closed borders, no new cases for three weeks. Alternatively, coronavirus may not like cold beer on ice.
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