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Friday Jokes

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Friday Jokes

Old 10th Jan 2017, 02:14
  #9381 (permalink)  
 
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Location: In the workshop, Prune-whispering.
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[IMG][/IMG]
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Old 10th Jan 2017, 08:15
  #9382 (permalink)  
RJM
 
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Old 10th Jan 2017, 14:21
  #9383 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
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Originally Posted by RJM View Post
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Old 10th Jan 2017, 19:54
  #9384 (permalink)  
 
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Old 10th Jan 2017, 20:13
  #9385 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: last time I looked I was still here.
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The 4 rings of marriage:

1. I'm madly in love = engagement ring.
2. I'm committed = wedding ring.
3. I'm still committed = eternity ring.
4. WTF have I done = suffering.
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Old 11th Jan 2017, 16:10
  #9386 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 59°09N 002°38W (IATA: SOY, ICAO: EGER)
Age: 76
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At last, a useful gift of socks

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Old 11th Jan 2017, 17:26
  #9387 (permalink)  
 
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Location: Cambridge UK
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Old 11th Jan 2017, 20:39
  #9388 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Old 12th Jan 2017, 07:14
  #9389 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
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Old 12th Jan 2017, 11:30
  #9390 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Dortmund
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The French and German on this cup looks questionable

And the author was either even less fluent in German than in French, or that third line was not even intended to be German (but Dutch or Afrikaans maybe).
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Old 12th Jan 2017, 12:18
  #9391 (permalink)  
Resident insomniac
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: N54 58 34 W02 01 21
Age: 75
Posts: 1,859
I believe that the eargesplitten loudenboomertube is a straight-through exhaustpipe.
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Old 12th Jan 2017, 13:03
  #9392 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Old 12th Jan 2017, 13:59
  #9393 (permalink)  
 
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Location: Farnham, Surrey
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Please don't tell 'em about the beaten eggs!

PDR
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Old 12th Jan 2017, 15:26
  #9394 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Unusual newspaper headline - an inflatable house?

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Old 12th Jan 2017, 20:19
  #9395 (permalink)  
 
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Old 12th Jan 2017, 21:01
  #9396 (permalink)  
 
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Location: Moscow, Russia
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NSFW

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Old 12th Jan 2017, 21:09
  #9397 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Heswall,Merseyside
Posts: 30
I felt like a fool when I bought David Bowie tickets for my son and then remembered that he died last year...

Even more so when I remembered that David Bowie died too.
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Old 13th Jan 2017, 00:11
  #9398 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Perth - Western Australia
Age: 71
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Job Interviewer: "So, it says here on your application that you're extremely quick at maths."

Job Applicant: "That’s right. I am."

Job Interviewer: "Okay - quickly, what’s 14 x 27?"

Job Applicant: "49."

Job Interviewer: "That’s not even close!"

Job Applicant: "Yeah, but it was fast, right?"
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Old 13th Jan 2017, 08:39
  #9399 (permalink)  
 
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What's the difference between a lentil and a chickpea?


Trump wouldn't have a lentil on him.
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Old 13th Jan 2017, 11:21
  #9400 (permalink)  
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Australia
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Originally Posted by racedo View Post
Bare Chest is a better idea
https://youtu.be/NmxeL0RuRr8
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